Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Long distance

8 replies

Laxwolves22 · 10/02/2022 22:20

Me and my ex recently split and we live 200 miles away. Neither of us drive and he works Mon-Friday. Both of our parents work full time as well so visitations is difficult. We split as he blamed me for the arguments even though the space we were having was supposed to be working on ourselves; he had enough as our recent argument I was also suffering with covid. Our LO is 4 months old and I financially can’t keep going down as I also have asthma & scoliosis. What do you recommend? I would love the relationship to somehow work as we were going to get a house together but he is 19 and in denial that he has his issues and thinks he’s better off from his son 200 miles away and without a girlfriend who did everything for him

OP posts:
Regularsizedrudy · 10/02/2022 22:24

What would I recommend? Let him go and get on with yours and your child’s life without him. You say you did everything for him, why would you want to be with someone like that? He sounds like a shit partner and a shit dad.

scoobydoo1971 · 10/02/2022 22:33

Look after yourself. You are your child's principle caregiver. Young children are not easy, but throw in health complications as a parent and it is a difficult time. I know, been there...got the badge. You should focus on your daily routine with your child. Let the father figure out the transport for himself. If he is motivated to see his child, he will find a way.

DatingDinosaur · 10/02/2022 22:35

I'd be thankful he lived 200 miles away and get on with my own life without him. The effort/stress ratio for that sort of distance is really not worth it. If he wants to see his son, he comes to you. He makes the effort. Does the travelling. You've got enough on your plate without pandering to his whims as well.

bongobingo43 · 10/02/2022 22:48

I agree with PPs that you're much better off without him 💐
You've also said he thinks he's better off without a gf doing everything for him, so regardless of what you want it, you can't force it:

However, I'm a bit confused about what you meant by this part of your post:

Both of our parents work full time as well so visitations is difficult.

What do you mean by this?

RedCandyApple · 10/02/2022 22:56

Who moved away? If it was you then yes you should be meeting half way

Original poster
Laxwolves22 · 10/02/2022 23:15

Thank you everyone! It’s good to hear outside views; @bongobingo43 our parents drive but we don’t so when they’re free they’ve been able to pick us up from where we are with the little one

OP posts:
Original poster
Laxwolves22 · 10/02/2022 23:16

@RedCandyApple I would but tickets are expensive. I’m a university student so I don’t get much finance and I’m still paying for half of our flat

OP posts:
Jk24 · 10/02/2022 23:42

Op its not down to your parents to help you see your boyfriend. If he's not willing to man up and get a home for his family then sod him. Sounds very immature

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread