Hey, I discovered last night that my partner has a porn addiction and has bdsm fantasies. He is 31 and I am 29 and we have a 2 month old and a 2 year old together. We are not married but have been together 6.5 years. It just seems crazy and I still don't believe it its like I don't even know him at all. He's never talked about that or shown any signs and we've never had that in our sex life at all. I'm so angry and don't know what to do. He was literally paying for 'interactive porn'. I have no idea how he's kept this secret for so long. That's how I discovered he says he's only been doing that for a short time. I confronted him last night and he was honest (I think) about it afterwards and he said that it was part of him he was ashamed of and that he hated he was into it and its so messed up and its like do I know you and I feel like everything is a lie. I kicked him out and I don't know where he went and I don't know whether I could ever let him come back. I don't know what to do though and I don't know who he is and I feel so angry and upset and everything has just collapsed and its like how could I not have known this and he says our relationship was who he really was and he just hid this other side of him which was like a completely different person and I just don't understand and also its just like so messed up and horrible the bdsm and its like that's what you really think of me and want to do to me and it just makes me feel sick. He says its a fantasy that he's ashamed of and its like I just don't get it its like how can he have so little respect and how can I not know and have kids with him