New Guy declaring undying love after only 5 dates?!?!

[FirstTimeSecondTime]

I met a guy OLD before Christmas, messaged and talked and went on 5 dates (met for a coffee, lunch, lunch at my place, dinner at his and finally a show and dinner last Saturday).

I had already decided before Saturday that I didn’t want to see him again. Despite appearing to have lots of common interests and similar outlook on life, I thought we were just too different. I also noticed that our conversations were mainly me asking about him and getting to know him, and him telling me how great I was and how lucky he was to be with me.

I went out on Saturday with him because I had spent a fortune on tickets for a show that I really wanted to see, and I would have felt bad taking someone else.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, after the show, on the way to dinner, we were walking along when he suddenly pulls me off to one side and tells me has something to tell me. His manor and expression was so serious that I genuinely thought there was something wrong. He tells me he is sorry but he has something that he needs to tell me, and then says he loves me!! The whole thing was so dramatic. I told him not to be ridiculous, he couldn’t possibly love me, he’s only known me a month!

As we walked on, he was saying things like how stupid he felt and how he hoped he hadn’t ruined things between us. I was so relieved that there wasn’t a real problem that I reassured him that he wasn’t an idiot and we should forget about it and enjoy our dinner.

I did text him the next day and tell him that it wasn’t going to work out and I wished him the best.

I am annoyed at the situation. He was so unnecessarily over dramatic, and how is it possible that a man in his 50’s can have such little self awareness! One of our first ever conversations had been about love bombing!

Not sure what the point of my post is. Just looking for some thoughts and feedback. Has anyone been in a similar situation?

He's either desperate because he's been single/lonely for a long time... or he's dodgy (wild declarations of love and attempts to rush into a relationship are something abusers often do).
Block contact and move on. If he starts to make a pest of himself, however, warn him to leave you alone and be prepared to take action if he doesn't - not saying he will, but sometimes people refuse to accept rejection and become tiresome and you need to crack down on it immediately.

He's either sure of his feelings, a love bomber or desperate.
In my experience though Arab men are very much like this usually within the first 24 hours a love declaration comes out. It's never put me off though because I'm used to it from them and realise it's how they are.
I can completely understand how this has put you off though. Just block him

I think he’s a bit lonely, but I’m not taking on a project or a fixer-upper.

He blocked me as soon as he read my message, I don’t think I’ll hear from him again.

Poor man, he sounds like he was lonely and desperate. So many single men in their 50s are. But he’s not your problem and you did completely the right thing. Next!

I had said I loved someone within probably less time. We are still together 10 years later and have a DD.

I fall 'in love' (or I think it's love) very quickly.
Unfortunately/fortunately I fall out of love very quickly too!

I can see why it's annoyed you, you don't want to feel responsible for his feelings - but you aren't and the fact he blocked you speaks volumes.

From dates I’ve been (mid-40s men), quite a few just seem so broken after lockdown. The lack of self-awareness I’ve experienced isn’t related to age but just the guys being utter dicks (not saying this guy is - he sounds lonely). I think you did the right thing by being clear with him. Don’t feel bad. Good to have your boundaries in place.

Maybe he sensed this was going to be the last time you would meet and acted a bit rashly

Bless him! He was probably infatuated with you. He will probably move on soon enough.

You say you talked with him about love bombing so did you also mention having had abusive relationships in the past? Because that can cause similar sorts to think 'aha Green light to abuse' and go straight into the tactics. Often they aren't very bright about how they go about it though.

Definitely a love bomber. No one is that dense that they get told about how grim something is and then proceed to do it anyway. It's arrogance, not ignorance.

My sister in law split from her husband a couple of years ago. She’s so desperate not to be on her own she latches onto anyone, whether they’re right for her or not. Adamant that they’re the one. Won’t listen to any cautions. Some people just can’t be on their own.