Long story shortened. My sister has lived in the uk for the past 20 years. She has a long term boyfriend who she’s been living with since 15 years. Shes owned her place since 10 years, bought with monies given by my mum. My sister is very convenient and has never been too interested in family relationships, hence has barely come home for these years. Generally we have to visit her.
I also had also lived abroad for the past 10-12 years. Not in one place, and I was only “allowed” to buy my own place as I started working full-time and not studying. My sister got hers when she was studying as she’s a drama queen.
As I became pregnant, I asked my mum if it’s ok if I give birth back home and not in England where my husband is from, as I’d like to spend more time at home during my maternity leave. As we have our childhood home standing empty most of the time apart from when I’m there, I didn’t think too much of it. The Covid hit, 3 months before my due date and there was so much uncertainty about how my husband would be able to join me for the delivery. He managed to join in time and we spent two weeks waiting for baby to arrive.
As I was two weeks overdue, knowing I was going to be induced the following day, my sister calls me crying saying she’s breaking up with her boyfriend - would it be ok if she comes and stay with me at our childhood home next week until she knows what she’s gonna do?
My reaction was pure stress. Living with a sister when my first baby is arriving? And also, I was not allowed to tell mum or anyone else. She came home 4 weeks later, but with the intention to come “help” me (my husband had left a few days earlier). All of a sudden the boyfriend drama was over. She didn’t help me, she mostly spent time on the beach and thinking about what she’s exercised. She also made me look like a lunatic, making my mum turn against me. I had a 2 month old baby and I was tired.
She left back to England end of the summer and things were smooth sailing until she called me half a year later crying; I’m pregnant and it’s unwanted (she doesn’t use any prevention relies on her cycle). “But my passport expires and I need to come home to have an abortion”. Don’t tell mum. Same story, she overloads me with worries and anxieties but didn’t want to tell mum cause she’s not close to her.
Crux of story, she then goes to mum and complains I treat her like “air” leading to my mum telling me to stop being so mean to my sister. My mum is on her side 150%. I feel lost. This girl has been Mia for the past decade or two, and now suddenly she’s using me as someone to offload and then goes to mum and say how mean I am?!