Feeling a little lost

[Flamingo89]

My boyfriend of 18 months broke up with me a few days ago, he didn’t really give me a reason and has blanked me since. I’m 32 and he was only 25. We plodded along quite well but it was never particularly passionate. We only ever argued twice, the first time he had a panic attack and this time he’s gone… it wasn’t even really an argument, I simply asked him if we could spend a bit more time together away from the pub. Why does it feel so awful even though I know I deserve better? Has anyone found real love in their 30’s and can someone help me with any coping techniques?

Sorry you're going through a tough time, OP. We're just giving your thread a bump in case anyone's around to give you a bit of support.

Thank you ❤️

And another bump for luck.

I'm in a relationship with someone I deeply love and care for. But we seem to have these arguments whenever I try to express my feelings in the relationship for more. In my situation my boyfriend was doing well when we met. But was on his ass in July last year due to know fault of his own. He's still on his ass financially and our relationship consists of me going to his house. That's it. Nothing else. No days out. No fun.

I often feel sad that I can't tell him what I'd like from the relationship without him somehow making it into a row.

I think you probably feel frustrated. You wanted to communicate with a person who you love and want to build up with. When you try to communicate. He shuts down. If you try express your feelings he runs away. You feel like he takes your control away. Then you start thinking I thought we loved eachother etc.

I'm 33 and my relationship is fairly new at 8 months. We've talked for over a year. Have I felt lik I've found my perfect love? Not really. It is a love. Its probably one of the most complex and emotional relationships I've had. I think you need to heal. You need to process why you feel sad. Learn to find some happiness again as a single person. Take your time. 18 months isn't that long to some but it's still a chunk of your life shared.

Sending you a hug x

I’m so sorry you’re feeling lost op.

It sounds like this guy had very low stress tolerance and poor communication. Really those are deal breakers for building a strong long term relationship.

It feels awful because he has let you down. You absolutely do deserve better ❤️

Be kind to yourself. Don’t think of a new relationship yet. Take some time to heal and reflect. This man didn’t deserve you but there is definitely one out there who does