Partners obsession with conspiracy theroies ruining our relationship

[00k198300]

Hi
Im looking for a little advice iv been with partner 18 years the last couple of years hes been really deep in all this conspiracy theroies about coronavirus,vaccines just everything. He spends all his time on his phone on youtube looking up watching videos he never communicates with me or our children. Me and him can be in the same room for hours and he dosent say a word to me and when he does its always about conspiracy rubbish that i believe nothing in its so hard to live with someone like this i think its become an obsession the relationship feels dead he spends all his time on his phone researching rubbish i feel alone and upset that all this conspiracy has taken over and i mean nothing. Iv told him how i feel about all of it but he just shouts and says im shutting him down. He calls me a sheep and that i need waking up.
What can i do? What should i do?
Hes driving me mad with this i have heart problems and its not doing me any favours.
I have no adult conversation at all only talk to my children.

OP sounds like yoj have your head screwed on and are making the right choice. It's all very sad that he has fallen into this weird rabbit hole but it doesn't mean you and the kids have to put up with this treatment from him . You don't!

Im so so sorry i read your comments wrong. Iv been thinking about ending the relationship for quite some time i needed all these comments to push me to do.it so thank you all

Hey Op you're doing great. Keep us posted yeah?

When you gonna talk to him?

My husband is like this, I think WFH for 2 years with the social isolation of that has drawn him to it. He follows anti-vax, new world order stuff so a huge confirmation bias going on. Talks a load of embarrassing bollox too. There is some sense and believability in some of the things he says eg yes, some people have developed myocarditis post vaccination, but overall it's unscientific nonsense.
Good luck in leaving your DH, I have no intention of doing that but my DH is not quite as bad and at least has a full time job.

Hi all thank you for being here for support.mc mooberry iv heard of new world order from him. Hes also researching illuminate reptilians allsorts. I asked him to leave he said no and got quite angry. So me and my children are now over my parents where we will be staying until i can get him off the tenancy and out of my home. Past year and half its got a lot worse i now finally feel a little free and at ease i cant believe iv actually left him. A little emotional as he was the love of my life apart from my children obviously! but knowing he chose all this conspiracy rubbish over me and our children i know i ment nothing to him and got to put me and my children first. Thanks again everyone means alot

Well done. Wishing you strength to get through this. You've done the right thing. ✅

Great update, well done op!

@Hen2018

He doesn’t work, smokes weed and talks shite all day.

Why are you still with him?

And is probably a pointless father to boot.

Good on you for taking action op. He is abusive and no kid should witness their mother tolerating that bullshit. Or they will think it is normal and acceptable and get into unhealthy relationships themselves.

No one who respects their partner calls them a sheep. Or chooses Facebook fame over their kwn family.

Get on to the council about the tenancy first thing on Monday.

Mine was the same and I ended it over a year ago. He got so obsessed he wasn't in the real world.

IVe lost my friend to this. She thinks I’m brain washed and I’ve poisoned myself and sterilised my kids with the vaccines ☹️.
There’s no reasoning with her now, she’s fully immersed in this world has has loads of new online friend supporting her view. I’ve just had to let her walk away.
She is highly educated and persuasive and at one point I actually started to half believe her about lizard people until my DH brought me back!

That’s good news, OP.

I had this with my partner of nearly 6 years, he became gradually more obsessed with covid conspiracy's, q-anon stuff even though we lived in the north of England and other crazy ideologies. It was only when I visited his distant family he was staying with, that it became apparent they were absolute nut jobs who were brainwashing his belief system. After trying to help him with his mental health and ultimately calling the police on him and his uncle for the dangerous 'harvey and aaron eastenders' type of conversations they were having, I left him shortly after, I was done trying to put up with that on top of the other concerning behaviours. Sadly I'd had two m/c's during our relationship, but I stay positive and see it as a connection to him that could have been challenging and for the best to not be in that position now. Obviously, you're in a more challenging position so if it becomes too much, please think about leaving with the right support. I am now a year down the line and couldn't be happier, work and emotional life is going great.

That all sounds incredibly difficult. I couldn't cope with living with someone who was deep down the conspiracy theory black hole. It's like losing someone to a religious cult and they need deprogramming to come back to who they were. I think you've made the right decision, for you and for your kids, especially the youngest. It can't be easy to walk away from a relationship of 18 years but it sounds like it was intolerable situation. Best of luck to you.

Good luck with it all. I’ve heard on here of other people’s partners who’ve gone down that route and they don’t seem to come back from it very often.

Admire you for your courageous decision.
Stick to your guns, and happy future

@halloweenie13 and @ baconandpineapple so sorry to hear youve gone through the same its very hard to live with and cope with im glad your happier now since leaving the relationship.
Anyway just an update im still over my parents but really wanting to be back in our home. Iv spoke to my housing officer and he has said he needs to speak to me and my ex partner and that my ex has to agree and sign the forms and know that hes making himself homeless i text him and hes laughing at me saying he isnt going to sign it. Surely this cant be right iv got to be able to get him off the tenancy and out of the home. This is really stressing me any more advice would be very muchly appreciated
Thank you.

I would phone Shelter for advice. They’re not just for people living on the streets; they can help with all sorts of housing questions.

And also Women’s Aid. I’m not sure how an occupation order works on a rented house but they’ll know!

You need an Occupation Order, please call Women's Aid for advice on how to get one.

He’s laughing about the fact that he won’t allow his 3 children to live in their own home without him! Shocking.

I think I would try to sit him down and tell him straight, he cuts this put an seeks help for his paranoia, or you will be walking away from the marriage. I have a few friends who have gone down this weird path and its heart breaking. You have my utmost sympathy

Who pays the housing association? Mobile and internet bills? Electric and water etc?

If the answer is you to all those sort of things then he won’t be able to afford to stay in the house. Make sure you explain that to the housing officer so that he knows that you are the person paying the rent etc.

You could also cancel mobile phone and internet as soon as you like 😉

He’s delusional and bullying you and your DCs.

Please seek expert advice ASAP and let the professionals take over.

Does he have any friends or family that you could speak to who could coax him out?

Cut off his internet.