Has my girlfriend been cheating on me?

[iwannabeadad]

I am a man and my girlfriend of 6 months, who claimed to be a straight woman, admitted today that she had been in love with a friend of ours who is a woman. I have known this woman and been friends with her longer than they have been friends. We met through this woman too. We all used to hangout together before we started our relationship. But after we started our relationship, my girlfriend has been insisiting that she spends time with this mutual friend of ours, alone. Which really got me wondering why and created certain clashes between us too. But only after 5 months, today she confessed to me that she was in love with this woman. (Before I started our relationship, I asked my girlfriend whether she had any feelings for this woman and she denied it and also claimed to be a straight woman)

The questions I would like help with answering are:

1. She has repeatedly been telling me that she is straight and even now she claims she is a straight woman. Can a straight woman be in love with another woman? (Am I stupid to ask this question or is my girlfriend a stupid/crafty woman?)

2. Only thing that really bothers me after she telling me this today is that, she insisting (From about 6 months ago, until recently) that she spends time alone with this woman, after we started our relationship (When we all could have hung out together like we used to before we started our relationship), and she having done so over my hurt feelings.

3. She only told me about this after that woman had stopped talking to her. And after I ended up talking to that woman a couple of days ago because of some other issue I had with my girlfriend. Do you think I should still trust my girlfriend after this? (She had previously been secretly talking to another guy she used to go out with before we got together, and told me about it, only after he stopped talking to her. To be fair to my girlfriend, there was nothing romantic/sexual involved in those internet based text chats, which she showed me when I asked for). She also claims that there was nothing romantic/sexual between she and this other woman too, during the time they spent together alone after she and I started our relationship.

4. She also has been refusing to answer her phone even for a second when one of her work friends is around, who also happens to be a female

5. My girlfriend also says I am her whole world and she would kill herself if I ever leave her. And says she was wrong to have kept this from me until now and that she would never keep any secrets from me hereafter and that I am all she needs. (and that she would do anything to prove it)

• I do not know what to do at this point. I care about her very much and I am very much in love with her. Even though our relationship is just 6 months long, we have spent at least over 8 hours a day in average together per day during that period of time, and also known each other for around 2 months before we started our relationship. So I could say this is a quite serious relatioship (at least it has been for me) and I am very close to her 10 year old kid too, who has started treating me like a dad. Do you think I should still trust my girlfriend and continue things as usual after this? What really bothers me is she insisiting that she spends time with that woman alone, after we had started our relationship. (and not having been honest about the feelings she had for that woman before we started our relationship, until now). Thank you.

None of this sounds like much fun at all. There is too much angst and doubt for this relationship to have a happy ending.
Your girlfriend sounds very manipulative, for instance telling you she would kill herself if you left her, is a very cruel bit of emotional blackmail.

To have serious doubts about the honesty of your girlfriend as you do, is a sign that you should end the relationship. Things won’t get better, they will get more complicated the longer you are together.

You have only been together a few months, leave now, don’t invest any more time in this difficult relationship.

You’re her whole world and she’ll kill herself if you left… she sounds like a perfect mother. Where does her child sit in all that? Poor kid. You shouldn’t be acting as a father to her child after 6 months and it’s horrible that you’ve both done that although I can see how you could unwittingly end up in that situation. She’s sounds untrustworthy and prone to drama and I expect unable to function without it. I bet she has a lot of dramatic stories about her exes. I would leave her too it personally but make the decision to leave or stay so the child doesn’t have any more upheaval.

Red flag city: threatening suicide?
If she says she’s in love with your other female friend surely that says she’s not in love with you..?
It’s too early in your relationship for acting like a dad to her child or getting yourself enmeshed in this drama/ nonsense of having secret conversations and meetings.
There’s no trust so no hope.
It’s a red herring as to whether she is straight or gay or bisexual: she doesn’t respect you

No 5 alone is enough for me to say run. This is extremely manipulative.

And no one should be very close to a partner's child within 6 months! This shows she, and you, have rushed the relationship. You are now feeling beholden tp her child as a father figure. Possibly she has manipulated you here too?

Being together 8 hours a day in a new relationship is too intense and show weak boundaries.

So your man with a woman who is in love with another woman ?
Sounds like you are being manipulated to stay with number 5.

Get out quick

Ltb

Someone who threatens to kill themselves if you leave them is manipulative not in love with you.

No, you shouldn't trust her. You should got rid of her already.

You shouldn't be close enough to her 10 year old for them to treat you like dad after 6 months.

You née to get out of this mess and engage your brain a bit better next time

Seriously, this is not a good situation for you or her child to be in.