Hi, I found out a couple of months ago that my husband who has been with me since I was 17 had been cheating on me for a minimum of 7 months. She is much older than me and I know you can't go on looks really, but no one knows what he sees in her. Anyway, I never even knew there was a problem with our relationship. We've always been so happy! He does have bipola, undiagnosed as he won't seak help. So he is very up and down. I've been used to this from a young age, and have always helped him though his down times. We have a daughter with learning disabilities and autism who is practically reclusive due to social anxiety. She won't go out without both me and her dad. This would make it very awkward for them to spend time together.
Anyway, for these reasons I've told him to decide between the two of us. He can't seem to though. He says he can't imagine life without her or me. I asked him who he'd find it harder to get over and he said me. I said that should answer your question then. He said, it should but it doesn't.. He says he loves/ adores me and always will. He's ashamed of what he's done and can't face people or life. He's very depressed and rarely leaves his bed when home. I'm helping him though it as I always have but I just feel so sad and anxious all the time not knowing. It has also sparked off my eating disorder and I was recently hospitalised for a few days. He was phoning her while I was in hospital, apparently because he was so worried about me.. Then he phoned her again recently to wish her a happy birthday. He lied about it but I saw it on his phone. I think nearly everyone would say to throw him out but it's so hard as I've loved hom for 23 years! 😢 I want him to make the decision so that I don't look back and regret it. I want him to regret it if he leaves.. I would really like some advice from anyone who's been in a similar situation. Did it work out for you? Thank you.