OLD and inconsistent messaging

[Lulu44]

I'd like outsiders views please on this as I've gone back and forth in my head about this so much I can't look at it clearly.

I've been talking to this guy on an app for a little over 2 months now. His bio is great, sounds just like my kind of guy, the messages are decent, lots of questions, short to medium paragraph lengths.
When we first started messaging it was only once a day, which I wasn't exactly chuffed with as previous experience of this never ended well. But its the length and chatty quality of that single daily message that kept me responding.
It then dropped to every other day.....then 2 to 3days.....then where we are now which is 4 to 5 days. Obviously lack of interest right!? Which is what I've thought.

We've had 2 attempts at arranging a first date, both cancelled due to illness on either side, and a 3rd attempt arranged for tomorrow, I just need to confirm the time. Only, all the excitement has gone on my part and I'm not sure whether to bother going now. Any dates have to be at least a week in advance due to him being 'busy' or the gaps between messaging mess things up.
I guess whats throwing me is the content of the messages and his arranging of a first date hints that he's interested, along with me seeing potential here (and probably overinvesting) but the gaps between messages tells me hes not interested?
What would you do in this situation?

Yeah he's not interested.

The interested guys want to meet up fairly quickly because they don't want someone else dating you and taking you off the market.

The ones who are just doing it for the ego stroke will message only.

Its way too long to be messaging. You should have met up within a few days or a week after being interested. If you are not feeling it then dont bother going. It will just be a waste of time and you will feel deflated.

Cut your losses. Is he realistically going to change?

Always best to meet up ASAP to determine if there is a spark in person.

On the flipside (based on my knowledge of a male friend who is OLD) maybe he's just busy with work and poor at multi tasking, or alternatively he's speaking to lots of other women too and hedging his bets.

I would go on the date. On many occasions I've been pleasantly surprised as lots of people are better in person than they are in writing. What have you got to lose (as long as you keep your expectations in check).

2 months of messaging. Nah, he’s turned from a potential date into a penpal. All that wasted time!

In future meet up within a week or two at most.

If you have been messaging for 2 months with not meeting, you have turned into penpals not potentials. If you liked him at the start, I'd say meet him and see how it goes. You must both be bored shitless of asking how the others day was.

Yep penpals is exactly how I'd describe it. My plan was to meet up after a week or two but its not gone that way at all. I understand people are busy but it feels so dragged out, especially for someone who's allegedly interested.

I was messaging for 3 months before we met . Been together 20 years .

If someone was taking 4/5 days to message me, I honestly wouldn't bother replying.

He is not interested.

Two months is too long to wait for a first meeting & 4 days between replies show he just does not care.

Next time, always try to meet people fairly quickly once you have done an initial screening for red flag and exchanged a few messages to check compatibility. Never longer than 2 weeks I would say.

If someone does not get back to you within a day, drop them.

OLD is full of time wasters who simply message when they get bored or need and ego boost but have no real intention of meeting.

I've had this happen so frequently and then don't bother meeting them. Like others have said, if he was that interested then you would have met him by now. There are a rediculous number of time wasters on OLD. It's so frustrating.

I’d go if you have finally arranged it but be prepared for him to cancel!

Don't think he sounds interested. 2 months is a long time to wait before a first date.
He's probably chatting to lots of people and has been on dates with them and you're a sort of back up. If you were his number one choice and he was really interested he'd have been on a date with you by now.
OR
He really doesn't have time for whatever reason so take that as an indication of how things would pan out if you did progress things with him. If you would be looking for something where you spend a fair bit of time together than look elsewhere as this is what he has available to offer or is prepared to offer you.

Maybe go on the date tomorrow, see how that is and then ditch if there's any doubt in your mind at all.

As others have said, he doesn't sound that into you unfortunately. I'm doing OLD myself at the moment and when I've had people message after ages, I automatically delete. However if the date is confirmed for tomorrow, I would go. At least that way you haven't entirely lost 2 months even if it doesn't work out.

However, if it goes well and he reverts to messaging every 4 or 5 days and/or doesn't set up a 2nd date swiftly (within 10 days of the first for me) I'd bin him off.