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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Changed my mind about what I want. Too anxious to talk.

1 reply

namechanged1867399 · 12/01/2022 15:32

I'm in a new relationship with a lovely, lovely man. He's fully accepting that I want to move slow as this is my first serious relationship since my ex three years ago. My ex was incredibly abusive and relationships since then have been non existent until now. Initially I was dead set against having more children due to abuse and birth trauma. The last couple of months I've been having therapy around this which has been incredibly helpful and has made me realise that I really do another child at some point in the future. I initially told my partner that I didn't want more children (it terrified me) and now I've changed my mind. I'm really anxious to bring this up. We've only been together a few months however I'm in my 30s and don't want to waste anyone's time. I'm not sure he wants any more children and I'm anxious to bring this up. Am I worrying over nothing? I can bring this up can't I? I'm struggling with my own thoughts at the moment and struggle to talk sometimes. I'm working on it...

OP posts:
freesolo · 12/01/2022 16:58

I would bring it up. Imagine getting heavily involved for the next few months, then saying you'd possibly like more children, and he definitely doesn't. It would be far harder for you both . Just explain it like you have here to him. And there's nothing worse than being anxious about something, you need to tell him.

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