Am I overthinking or just a product of my past on this one ?

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Been with my bf for 18 months.both divorced and late 40's. We are incredibly happy, don't live together and don't intend to until our kids are grown up. The elation ship is equal and is my first since my marital breakdown. Exh had an affair and left leaving us shell shocked and broken for a time. I have huge issues trusting myself and my judgement but with therapy, I'm definitely getting better. It took me the first year to really trust my bf and he has never given me reason to doubt his loyalty to me and us.
He has recently jobs to London, still only a 40 minute commute for us but we see each other eow for full weekend and a day or overnight on alternate weekends. We speak and text everyday and there has been no change to the relationship.
He speaks a lot about work as it's new and he's really happy having come from a shit atmosphere at his last.
He speaks about a woman he works with when we see each other. He really admires her work ethic and performance .. he was her senior for the first few weeks and she made the transition easier for him. They text re work now and again and he is open about all of this.
I'm worried if he is falling for her. She is also divorced, kids, ten years younger but physicallly not his type but I know that's not hugely relevant when it comes to love! She is also in a relationship albeit a more casual one than ours.
The thing is and here is the hypocrite .. my closest friend is male, we work together and are always in contact. He is in a relationship too and there are no feelings there.
I am open about him to my bf and often share funnies that he may send etc.my bf never said he felt threatened but when he heard that my friend was going to propose to his partner, he definitely relaxed more about him and our exchanges .
Please tell me am I just overthinking.... I'm a HUGE overthinker , do I need to worry or is my past playing up ?
Please give me your honest thoughts.

Ps my exh met his affair partner at work as did both my sisters ex fiancé's who also left them. I know of so many work related relationships that destroyed family's and marriages and relationships and I don't think I'm strong enough to go through such horrible heartbreak again. Thanks

Anyone please?
My overthinking has ramped up a bit today

You're definitely overthinking! There's no reason to suspect anything will happen, it's your mind working overtime.

It doesn’t sound like anything to worry about- it sounds like you have found a good relationship with this man.

Thank you so very much for responding.
I needed to hear some honest thoughts from an objective point of view. I could not talk to my three closest friends about this as they have been at the end of a partner meeting women in their offices and breaking their hearts.

It sounds like you are overthinking it, which is understandable considering your history and that of your friends. Your partner seems very open and as you say you too have a very close friend of the opposite sex which he has been nervous of (so it sounds) so I'm sure he is aware of how you may worry.
If you continue to be worried do please ask him for reassurance. It's his job to reassure you and care about your feelings!

I was going to do that but when we met the other day and we were chatting about work and the lady he works with,he was just stroking my hand and kissing me on the forehead now and again and I just thought.... what the hell is wrong with me ? I've no reason to worry , he is so attentive and loving and we speak about our future , so I felt a bit daft to bring it up.
I wa s going to say to him the next time he starts chatting and her name pops up, that he talks about her a lot and is there anything we need to be concerned about?
Should I ?

Life would be simpler if challenges like this didn't come along, and for some they don't. However, things do often challenge, and it's how you deal with it that counts. It's how you see things, you already know that it's possible to have a platonic work friend of the opposite sex, this could be that and at this stage it's better to see and treat it as exactly that, otherwise it will start to impact how you behave around your DP and affect the nice relationship you have.
That's not to say that further development could occur, it's equally possible, but what a miserable situation it would be to start policing someone else. Relationships are best based on trust and freedom. If someone wants to go off with another, hurtful though it is, you know from experience that it's a sign that you are better off without them.
Expect loyalty, if you don't get it, you weren't right for each other.
How do you stop the anxiety over it in the meantime? Well if you accept that it's not a situation you can have change or control over, it goes in the category of don't worry about what you cannot change, change the things you can. Yup can't stop a friendship developing, you can and have kept your independence should unwanted developments happen.
Every relationship is a risk and a leap of faith, you back yourself, and what you have together. If you have a mature, developed man in your life, he'd be a fool to go elsewhere - yes these fools exist, but then you find out that they weren't worthy of you.
I have an ex who was a fool, he now wants me back, he can dream, not happening, I've moved on to someone who is far more loving and loyal.

Thanks again for another thoughtful
Post. I know what you're saying is completely right.
There are so many work place relationships and affairs though amd
My
Own experiences for help. Should I address it do You think of it becomes a habit of talking about her? Then again, I talk about my friend regularly too?? I just don't know what's wrong with me .