Last chance meet

[Lastchancesussex]

Hello everyone.

First time poster.

I wanted a bit of advice as I am meeting my ex for a bit of a farewell.

Lots of love, lots of tears over the last year but we need to fall over the cliff to see what happens. There is lots of compassion but we have been hit by a number of circumstances that have just caused us to split. Nothing serious and that’s half the problem, we actually get on.

So we are meeting this evening to say farewell until early March. No texts, no calls just a complete break. We are not sure what is on the other side.

I’m of a mind that it’s my final chance to say to her that both our mistakes of the past aren’t as important as how much we care for each other and that I want to do everything to repair it and build something new after early March.

We had a 3 hour emotional call last night where we both cried. Talking about the relationship is pretty much what has done this.

Any advice would be welcome.

Thank you.

Should I buy her some flowers?

No.

acknowledge that 90% of what we had is good.

I agree with @Bowwowwowoh that this is not a percentage game. Also it's very telling that you've written that sentence using past tense. Unfortunately some relationships just reach a natural end - it doesn't matter how good things used to be - they are no longer.

Also lots of posters including myself have asked you some questions about your relationship and the nature of your split/separation ...... but so far you haven't answered any of the specifics.

These could help posters give you some specific guidance & help - if indeed thats what you're really after here?

What is the point of this.

You had the conversation? This is just adding salt to the wound or trying to romanticise something.
If it is over for now, then don't meet.

Should I buy her some flowers

Concrete sledge 🙄

You fucked up, now do the decent thing and leave it alone. The histrionics are completely unnecessary.

'She put on a lot of pressure when i had pressure at work, family and lockdown. It broke me.''

This is not the sign of a healthy relationship.

You seem to be blaming only yourself her but by reading the above I would say that your partner played a big part in your difficulties.

It all sounds a bit dramatic and complicated.

I would use this break to focus on yourself and look at whether this is really working, not to overly romanticised what you had.

I wonder if you are not both just caught in the drama and the idea of this relationship rather than the reality of it which does not sound too great at the moment.

All very dramatic and exhausting.

People in healthy loving relationships don't 'break' each other OP.

No, you shouldn't meet up again and no, you shouldn't buy her flowers. Choose freedom from drama and you'll never look back.

I don't get it. Does she want to break up but you don't? Did you chuck her? It makes a difference.

Relationships don't have to be this dramatic y'know?

I think you are enjoying the drama. Let her go and meet somebody more mature