to ask about potential alcoholism

[Flutterflybutterby]

If someone drank 2-5 beers every night (Monday to Thursday, and Sunday) and more on Friday and Saturday nights (a bottle of wine and a couple of beers, for example) would this require professional help to quit drinking?

Not asking for myself, I quit drinking some time ago due to also having a problematic relationship with alcohol. I'm asking for a family member but due to my own previous heavy drinking feel unable to give an informed and educated answer (I quit without any professional help but am not sure if I should have and did suffer from some headaches and anxiety issues afterwards - which are now over - but unsure if they were directly linked to alcohol withdrawal or more from the stress of a complete lifestyle change!)

Any advice would be appreciated!

(sorry to post in relationships, but DR is reluctant to go to a professional but keen to get drinking under control, so I thought someone on here might have an idea of if a professional was definitely necessary!)

Not always necessarily, but if DR (dh?) is only keen to get it under control (words) and not actually cutting back (actions) then I'd say yes a professional is needed.

No it's not my husband, it's my sister. When I qhjt I started suffering from some migraines and anxiety symptoms (that were part of the reason I'd started drinking in the first place as a teenager). She's concerned that this could have been some type of withdrawal and has read that withdrawal can be very dangerous. She's a mum (a surprisingly good one despite the amount she drinks - only drinks with kids in bed and manages to go to work and be a decent parent during the day) so she's (ironically) worried about the health implications of quitting cold turkey.

I'm not sure if it's relevant to quitting but when there is an event or occasion and other people are drinking, she can easily drink until sime time the next morning, and not particularly early - getting home at 6 or 7 AM wouldn't be remarkable for her).

Did you grow up in a household where a heavily drinking parent also resided?. I ask this only because both your sister and you went onto develop alcohol dependency issues. You've managed to quit alcohol and she has not. Does she actually want help to quit for her own self or do you want her to get help for her own self?.

She has developed a very high tolerance to alcohol over the years.
When is she ever completely sober rather than on a comedown from alcohol?. Does she drive?. She's drinking every single day and she's never completely sober. Its controlling her isn't it?.

At some stage her life is going to come crashing down around her ears. She may well have her kids, job etc - well for now until she does not. There are no guarantees when it comes to alcoholism; she could well go onto lose everything and everyone around her and she could still choose to drink afterwards.

I would think she is not managing to hide her excessive drinking from her children at all and they will pick up on this if they have not already. At the very least they are seeing the empty bottles in the recycling. Where is the children's father here?.

That’s a lot…for my standards at least.
But I grew up outside of the UK where drinking was usually combined with a meal, so my parents drank every day but just 1 beer or a glass of wine if some sort depending on the meal with coffee after dinner. Anyone drinking the amounts you describe would definitely be seen as someone with alcohol issues although not necessarily a classic stereotype alcoholic (always drunk & unable to function).

I wouldn't have thought that level of drinking would need a professional detox but it would be worth her checking with her GP.

If one of her children were ill and needed care during the night would she be able to not drink for that night or several nights?

@AttilaTheMeerkat

That's a bit OTT. At one end of the scale she's 2 bottles of beer a night (small? large? low or high ABV?) so hardly a raving alcoholic.

I think it's a dangerous amount to drink personally. Seeing a professional couldn't hurt.

Yes. I went into hospital last year for something completely unrelated and ended up in for 4 days as I went into withdrawal.
I was drinking a bottle of wine a night, a bit more on weekends.
I was in total shock. I knew I was drinking too much but never for a second that I had a physical addiction.
3-4 beers is around the same as a bottle of wine so possible.

Am not being OTT here at all.

This is the comment:-

"2-5 beers every night (Monday to Thursday, and Sunday) and more on Friday and Saturday nights (a bottle of wine and a couple of beers, for example)"

When is this woman ever properly sober if she is drinking every single evening, presumably as well on her own?. Its well over the weekly recommended 14 units for women. And I would also think this woman is underestimating badly how much she is putting away. I also note that her sister (the OP) has had drink dependency problems also.

There’s physical dependence and psychological dependence.
If your sister stops drinking and has physical symptoms —— shaking, sweating, vomiting, feeling cold/ chills she has physical dependency.
If she feels anxious, jumpy, as if she needs to search out alcohol or use something else to replace alcohol, becomes angry, explosive or retreats to crying, rocking then she has psychological dependency.
Either would indicate she needs professional help. Alcoholics Anonymous will offer support, she can search online for an Alcohol and Drug dependency service near her or call her GP.
Anyone supporting an alcohol dependent friend/ relative can contact AlAnon which supports the supporters.