Ds comes downstairs, there's clearly something wrong. On asking him what, "his life is shit". It's shit and boring. I basically said most people's lives are quite boring, you go to work, come home, maybe go out at the weekend. "Well I want more". He wants a "hobby", to pursue his music but apparently there are NO courses in our area, none at all. I find this quite hard to believe. I suggested he ask on local fb groups for recommendations, he was barely listening.
He was clearly in a fouler.
I just find it so hard to have any sympathy, we aren't talking about a teenager here he's 25. He works part time by choice, I only ask him to contribute to rent. I dont ask for anything towards bills or food. He has a roof over his head, has nothing to worry about and the majority of his wages are his to spend as he pleases. I ask him to keep his room clean, sometimes he does his own tea. He takes the bins out once a week, and now and then i'll ask him to take a turn cleaning the bathroom.
He has the choice to go out with local friends but prefers to sit in his room on his playstation.
What exactly is so shit about that life?
I despair sometimes, I honestly dont know how he would cope if he moved out. His younger sister is completely different, and they've been brought up exactly the same.
I'm all for following your dreams and wanting something better but the reality is if you want any quality of life you have to work, you have to do things you dont want to do sometimes.
I feel terrible saying this as he does suffer with anxiety which I fully understand as I do too but how much of it is anxiety and how much is just entitlement? He will pay for travel miles away to see a friend, go out on the town...I couldn't do that, my anxiety is so severe I rarely leave the house. He spends a lot of time on twitter and i'm aware it's quite trendy to have some kind of mental health condition these days, as ridiculous as that sounds. I do wonder if he's swayed by the things he reads sometimes.
You cant have it both ways in my opinion, live here, work part time and enjoy having no responsibilities or work full time, move out and enjoy your independance.
He does have a strange way about him that we've noticed, NOTHING is ever enough. Just in general. He goes through life bored, fixated on something which is then quickly redundant.
I don't know whether he needs a reality check or really does have a problem. His sister has had exactly the same upbringing, same life and she copes just fine. Her emotions are normal, she feels sadness, loss etc but she gets over it. Not once has she ever said her life is shit or moaned about having his hand me down furniture. (We aren't well off). He's just so delicate! It's a mystery to me but then I think maybe i've just had such a tough life that i'm not seeing it..i'm doubting myself.