Hi so I've been with an amazing guy for 4 years. We have 2 children, ones mine and ones ours. My previous marriage ended after a year on account of his cheating. It was an abusive relationship so i vowed I would only look for someone nice the next time around. Well I found him, my partner is lovely, the kind who helps random strangers and neighbors, treats my DC like his own, an amazing dotting father to our DC. Doesn't booze it up in the club, is always home except for work and out with his boys maybe twice a year which at our age ends at about 10pm. He tells me he loves me, I look beautiful all the time. His parents adore me and treat me like their own.
BUT
he has no vision, no goals and no ambition. I have come to find this very unattractive.
I can't look past it.basically has no interests aside watching tv, all the time. Has worked the same job for 18 years and is still on minimum wage. Only with my encouragement has he thought of leaving. He has no training outside of high school, I have a Bachelors degree. I started a business in lockdown and it's always him throwing ideas my way about what I can do. I'm also a writer so he keeps telling me I should write a novel. Which is supportive but what about ideas for his own self improvement?? I've given him a few but he's never keen. Doesn't see his friends outside of the 2 meet-ups in the year.
I also just find myself not physically attracted to him. We have a 1 year old, lockdown etc could have contributed to all this so I'm hoping to see how it goes.
Meanwhile wedding is supposed to be 2023, some days I plan and get all excited, other days I think why should I plan a wedding I don't want? I have no clue what to do? When people get married are they 100 percent sure that's who they want? Are they 200 percent happy ? Or is this normal to feel like this ??? HELL