Let’s call her Leanne. I don’t want to be friends with Leanne anymore. We’re not even really friends, more like acquaintances, but I feel pressured to keep inviting her to stuff by some of our mutual friends. E.g. One privately messaged me to ask Leanne be added to a WhatsApp group about a particular hobby some of us share, because Leanne feels left out, and Leanne’s never added any comments or joined in the hobby. She clearly just wants to see what we’re all talking about.
The large friendship group includes some who’ve known each other since we were at primary school and others who joined over the years. We’re in our 50s. Leanne’s never invited me to her home, never invited me to anything, never texts or calls. She’s no fun and doesn’t talk much on the occasions I do see her.
The problem is she’s close friends with two of the other women in the group and whenever we organise something without her, Leanne makes passive aggressive remarks on social media and so far no-one’s wanted to get into an argument with her. Plus as she’s so subtle about it, we know she’d say we’re being over sensitive about the nasty comments.
She often doesn’t even reply to get togethers she is invited to and rarely attends, but if she’s not invited, she gets huffy and complains to the other two or adds passive aggressive remarks to social media about ‘knowing who your real friends are’ etc. I’m sick of it. It’s causing tension in the group and not just with me.
Most of the women in the group don’t enjoy her company and some have asked me not to invite her anymore (I organise a lot of our get togethers). I don’t want to invite her but I suspect the other two will fall out with me if I don’t. She’s not someone most of us would be friends with if we met her today, she’s just been around a long time. What would you do? I feel too old for this nonsense.