Hello
I have posted here previously under a different name, about my relationship problems due to my partners anger issues. I got a lot of good advice, but unfortunately I wasn’t quite ready to hear it.
While I’m not going to go into everything that has happened, recently things have got a lot worse, and although he has not yet hurt me, this week has been bad- he has chased one of my cats round the house trying to hit him with a scratching post, threatened to smash a plate in my face, and threatened to strangle me. I don’t think he would actually hurt me, but I am becoming increasingly worried that he will hurt my cats. He is very depressed, regularly threatens to kill himself and although we have a lot of good times together, most days we have some sort of argument/him having a meltdown and blaming me. He knows he has a problem and apologises most of the time after, which is why it’s so hard to leave. We have so many plans for the future together, and I do really love him a lot. I have not yet decided if I will leave or not, but if I do, please could someone advise me on the following:
We have a joint mortgage and both own the house- what happens if one of us moves out? I imagine if it happens it won’t be amicable- do I contact the mortgage company, or what actually happens?
Can I legally take our cats if I leave? They are microchipped and registered with the vets in my name, and I have messages proving I bought them, but I’m worried he would call the police on me if I took them. I’m also worried that he might take the cats, and I won’t be able to rescue them, but I don’t think that he would be in a mental state to arrange that.
How do I actually do this? What do I need? Should I just take all the paperwork? I don’t know if I will decide to go or not, but if I do I need to be prepared. I’m not really worried about the anger towards me, because I know he’s mentally ill and doesn’t mean it, but I won’t tolerate him taking it out on our cats.