Starting a relationship with someone in the RAF

[Leer0y]

Hi All

I'm applying to join the RAF and have almost been accepted onto the officer training program. My reason for posting is that I'm a 47yo male who is single and very much looking to change that!

I feel that the RAF will offer me amazing opportunities to advance my nursing career and offer lots of amazing life opportunities, but one of my main life goals at this time in my life is to meet someone special, fall in love and have a serious long term relationship.

And so I'm having a real dilemma because I've heard that relationships and the armed forces don't exactly go together. So I thought I'd ask here what your views/opinions are if you met someone at that age, how would it affect your decision to date/get serious with them?

In my 20s, I might have settled down with a young guy in the forces, as I wouldn't have been deterred from that life at that age. Plus for most, there's a different, more settled life post-service.

Now that I'm in my early 40s? Absolutely not a chance would I contemplate it for a second.

Against my better judgment i married someone in the army and it was exactly how I feared it would be. Very difficult to carry on a normal relationship, I barely saw them and they never made Me feel I was a priority. The other issue was how institutionalised he became - his views were completely at odds with mine or anyone i know. I found the army very old fashioned expecting me to be a SAHM who waited around for him. There is no way I would consider someone in the forces again. However, the forces do present incredible opportunities for your career and if you do choose to leave later will set you in good stead for another job. I guess it depends on your priorities.