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Is it a guy thing?

5 replies

debsblondie22 · 29/12/2021 10:15

Hello you lovely ladies, just a question to see if anyone else thinks this is a guy thing or if its disrespectful. Just a bit of a back story, my partner and i have been together for nearly 2 years. We have an amazing relationship together and he has a fantastic bond with my 2 children from a previous relationship. He is the best man I've met, we met each other when we were 16 but were just friends. He had a girlfriend, i had a boyfriend, both idiots but anyway it took me 6 years to get away from my abusive ex and he has since moved miles away from me and the kids so my boyfriend has basically took them on as his own. My boyfriend hasn't been with anyone else besides his ex girlfriend who treated him like crap and she also had a baby with another man that my boyfriend ended up stepping up for too but they split up because she cheated. Both exs are out the picture and everything is perfect, the kids and i are happy and my boyfriend and i are trying to conceive our own baby. I had a chemical pregnancy last week but that's just brought us closer. Anyway a few weeks ago my boyfriend was showing me a video on his instagram and he went to his search bar and i couldn't help notice his search history. He was looking at loads of pretty girl, models, the type with barely any clothes on, fake boobs, fillers and super skinny. If I'm honest my heart sank. We talk about everything openly and hide nothing from each other so i questioned him. He was reassuring me that he loves me for me he has no interest in any other woman he must have clicked on it by mistake but I'm not convinced. I don't know if I'm being silly but i got upset because I'm the complete opposite. I'm curvy and have small boobs and i struggle with my confidence. I said to him are you sure I'm enough because i don't feel like i am. Why does he feel the need to look at other girls when he said that's not what he was into. Is it just a guy thing?? I'm struggling to understand as i have no interest at looking up other males.

OP posts:
Fairycake2 · 29/12/2021 15:20

Some guys do look at this stuff online, many don't but it's bullshit that he clicked on it by mistake! Ultimately it doesn't matter if others do it or not, it's whether you find it acceptable or not

ShampooDoodle · 29/12/2021 15:27

It’s not about who he finds attractive in real life, so it’s really not about you and who you are. Think about the celeb you really like is he the same as your dp in every way? Highly unlikely. If you done feel comfortable with him looking at these women then you have to choose if it’s a deal breaker.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 29/12/2021 15:46

He says he clicked on what by mistake?

The first few letters spelling out each woman's name? So he accidentally clicked on the search results and each one happened to be of a very similar type of profile - a woman with fake boobs, filler etc?

What are the odds? Zero, the odds are zero.

Agree with PP it doesn't matter if other blokes do it, what matters is whether you are ok with it.

I would be very unimpressed he lied about it too, especially as you consider this to be a very open and honest relationship. He should be man enough to at least say 'yeah I looked up their profiles' instead of bullshitting you.

ANameChangeAgain · 29/12/2021 15:54

Of course he didn't click it by mistake, but that doesn't mean he has done anything wrong. My feed is full of the Ant Middletons, Bob Morleys, Liam Helmswhatsitthors of the world, it doesn't mean anything.

Pinkbonbon · 29/12/2021 16:21

Looking at hot women may be a guy thing. Lying about doing so however, is a dickhead thing.

I hope you didn't actually say 'am I 3nough?' to him. Why would you ever devalue yourself like that to someone? Maybe that's why he thinks it's OK to lie to you.

We accept the treatment we think we deserve.

But op, you can fancy all types of bodies on individuals. Liking crisps doesn't mean you don't also like bacon right?

Him lying is not OK. But neither is your thought pattern about your value.

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