Hi. I’ve been married now to my husband for 6 years and we have two children. One 5 year old and one 6 month old.
From the very start of our marriage my husband has been very controlling with money. After I had my first child he did not want me to return to work. My husband is financially very secure and earns in excess of a 6 figure salary. We soon started to argue daily about extended family issues, the fact how he feels I’m ungrateful and do nothing at home etc, which resulted in me going back to work so I could support myself. I come from a healthcare background myself as does my husband so I am more than capable of supporting myself and family.
Just to say I do all the routinely household jobs, wash, cook daily, clean, iron etc as well
as entertain and cook for his parents 5 days a week.
He regularly calls me names such as “ungrateful”, “stupid”, “freeloader”, “f-ing idiot” along with many more and never once have a retaliated and sworn back.
He occasionally stops talking to me for days without any explanation and when I ask him
Why he just says “ he has nothing to say to me”.
I have said multiple times to him that one day he will push me too far and I will go.., his response is go, take the car, house, f-off.
On the other hand he can be the nicest most loving person in the world. He can be very generous when he wants to be so it’s not always that bad.
I’ve just had another baby and whilst pregnant I lost my father so I feel weak and vulnerable right now. Currently again he’s not talking to me, which may again go on for days, today he has been out for 12 hours and leaves me with the kids.
His relationship with the kids is basic, he never does anything for them like homework, bath, feed, change etc. he will always spend a lot of money buying them the top of the range toys.
On the outside our lives look perfect, one even I would envy looking in but I’m struggling so much every day and I don’t know what to do. Please help.