Why does my husband just not listen to a word I say?

[Applebananaorange]

Does anyone else have this? Out shopping and the arrangement was wed arrive, get lunch, shop. Hungry children and me asking DH to please stop at a cafe but he just keeps walking looking for a cafe despite the fact he’s no idea where he’s going. Ended up feeding in the middle of the shopping mall kneeling down. Just so fed up

Why on earth didn't YOU go to a cafe with the kids and feed them?

I’m thick, ugly and stupid

Because her husband was striding off ahead?!

Besides, I was in a city I didn’t know well. I’d have had to wrench the pushchair off of DH and walk off.

Walk away from him, he'll follow you. You don't need his guidance or permission.

if he's walking looking for a cafe then surely he was looking for somewhere to stop?

@Applebananaorange

I’m thick, ugly and stupid

Being single is easier. Xx

My x used to call me a hairy midget too stupid to cook a ready meal.

He made everything TWENTY times hsrder.

Dont fear life as a single parent if life feels impossible now.

@Applebananaorange

I’m thick, ugly and stupid

Says who?

Oh! He had at least one child held ransom to his striding🙂

What did he say when you ended up kneeling on the pavement to feed your kids?

Did he show any sign of understanding the problem?

@Applebananaorange

I’m thick, ugly and stupid

Woah! Who said that?

@Applebananaorange

I’m thick, ugly and stupid

I feel like there may be many more problems here. Why do you believe this of yourself?

He’s done it before, when I was pregnant. He gets so hung up looking for somewhere that you just can’t stop him. He’ll spend ages.

So I’ll say something like shall we head to M & S, there’s a cafe there but he ignores you, just strides on reading out places.

I dunno. It’s not just that. On its own it’s annoying and really frustrating but I constantly feel like I get no say in anything. Which is probably unfair.

I don’t think he was fussed about the feeding in the middle of the shopping centre. It’s honestly like he thinks that meal times for kids don’t matter. I’m so frustrated today.

Right so he strides on with the pushchair. Do you have money of your own on your person? Stride the other direction, take whichever kids you’ve got attached to you and go to M&S or wherever is nearest. Shout to him “we’re going in here for lunch”. Don’t wait for a response or permission. Just go. He’ll either find somewhere else to feed the baby in the pushchair or he’ll follow you.

Ignore what he says just go into the cafe you want to - you are allowed to go into a cafe and order yourself something to eat - you don't need anyones permission or agreement to do that , like a PP says, he'll soon follow you.

Or just stop going out on shopping trips with him if it's stressful and he's being a twat. Going shopping and out for lunch with 2 kids on your own is easier than going with someone who'se not helping but hindering.

That sounds really draining. You obviously have a lot of DH issues to deal with.

I am guessing that talking to him is pointless so all that leaves is what do you want to happen? How can you achieve that?

@Applebananaorange

I don’t think he was fussed about the feeding in the middle of the shopping centre. It’s honestly like he thinks that meal times for kids don’t matter. I’m so frustrated today.

He wasn't fussed about you feeding in the mall because it didn't impact HIM.

Next time, make sure you're pushing the pushchair & just go wherever you want for lunch. He'll either follow, or not and you'll be much better off without him, imo!