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Original poster

Looking for insight into male behaviour..!

31 replies

SnotFace · 20/12/2007 21:01

How can you tell if a "spoken for" man is attracted to you? In his behaviour I mean.

Obviously I'm not intending to do anything silly, I'm just genuinly curious!

OP posts:
YuleLoveHekateAtSolstice · 20/12/2007 21:03

No idea. Probably same way as any other man, but not in front of the wife.

Original poster
SnotFace · 20/12/2007 21:04

How is that though? My experience of flirting is limited lol

OP posts:
christmosschops30 · 20/12/2007 21:05

If he has a penis, he probably wants it

(sorry take no notice am in a mood with dh hence men in general tonight)

TLV · 20/12/2007 21:06

if he is spoken for then I would say leave it well alone

Monkeytrousers · 20/12/2007 21:06

Flirting is not the same as interested

Tommy · 20/12/2007 21:06

depends - I have a male friend who is very flirtatious whether his wife is there or not.

I thought it was just flirting then someone told me he sneaked out at my wedding and was snogging another guest

YuleLoveHekateAtSolstice · 20/12/2007 21:07

Doesn't matter though, does it? If he has a partner the best thing to do is to remain un-flirted with and not even think about it.

But I guess it would be lots of compliments, looking at you, finding reasons to talk to you.

frostythesnowmum · 20/12/2007 21:08

If he is happy and not looking then probably not but if he has a wandering eye and probably a wandering penis then I suspect it would be obvious
why? Its not fair to ask these type of questions without the back ground

Original poster
SnotFace · 20/12/2007 21:11

reason I asked is because I want to tread carefully...I have to see this man all the time and he's VERY friendly. If its genuine friendlyness then thats fine but if not I dont want to encourage by being too friendly back iyswim. I heard a "rumour" from an unreliable source that he has tried it on with women before whilst married but that was probably crap, "Girl talk".

He keeps looking at me, finding reasons to talk to me and has recently started with the compliments but he runs hot and cold, other days he just ignores me completely!

OP posts:
TLV · 20/12/2007 21:13

then ignore him! or be very distant but polite and he will soon get the message

suwoo · 20/12/2007 21:14

I think he sounds like a cock.

DeePandcrisPandeven · 20/12/2007 21:16

I don't think there is any way of telling in a random sort of sense.....we are individuals!!!!! And so behave individually....if I am 'attracted' to some woman, I usually try to keep a low profile, as my form is just to blush and come out with inane rubbish that just makes me want to curl up in embarrassment even as the words pass my lips!

Elizabetth · 20/12/2007 21:23

Girl talk is often quite accurate. He sounds like a knob - the only person he should be paying compliments to is his wife.

SantasElasticKnickers · 20/12/2007 21:25

he sounds like he is in love with himself

Original poster
SnotFace · 20/12/2007 21:28

he recently asked about my relationship status and enquired about a man I was with asking who he was etc. Thats what got me worried.

OP posts:
Monkeytrousers · 20/12/2007 21:30

If he's a serial shagger why do you want to be a notch on his bed post?

LittleGoldfish · 20/12/2007 21:35

Why don't you tell him you are not comfortable with his flattery and steer clear. Don't get involved with him - he sounds like a womaniser. Besides, if hes married then how would you like it if a woman went for your DH (assuming your married/relationship of course).

lou33 · 20/12/2007 21:40

keep dropping his wife into the conversation, i find that to be hugely off putting to married men who try it on with me

Monkeytrousers · 20/12/2007 21:42

Do you fancy him?

Original poster
SnotFace · 20/12/2007 21:49

I'm honestly not "going for him", I'm genuinly just curious, trying to work him out. I can't stay clear of him, we have to see each other every day and I have to talk to him. Cant say why (dont want to put across too many details) but he seems like a good bloke, I was just hoping I'd read the signals wrong.

I have namedropped his wife a few times and he goes a bit quiet when I do.

I don't fancy him but I must admit I do enjoy his company, we share alot of the same interests which is probably what fuels alot of the conversations but thats it.

I still think I may have read him wrong and got overly paranoid.

OP posts:
lou33 · 20/12/2007 21:56

well tbh he can put all the signals out he likes, but if you dont respond to it in any way but cool and detached, then nothing is likely to happen

so just keep on acting neutrally when you have to engage with him

unless he forces the issue of course

Monkeytrousers · 20/12/2007 22:02

No, don't think you probably hacve read him wrong. Womanisers are always on the pull - they get turned down a lot, but they score a lot too. This guy is defo sniffing around you.

Monkeytrousers · 20/12/2007 22:03

But he's probably sniffing around every other woman in his vicinity too! So don't be too flattered.

Have you seriously never met one of these before? How old are you?

Original poster
SnotFace · 20/12/2007 22:08

No I honestly never have. I got with my ex when we were 16 and was with him all the way up until 2 years ago. In that time I never went out of did anything without him, its only recently that I've started to be "me" again and go out doing stuff. I'm 25.

OP posts:
Monkeytrousers · 20/12/2007 22:15

Well just be very careful not to get carried away by the flattery. It's all just a game for him.