How to move on

[Purplepancakes]

Met a guy 6 months ago and for first few months he was amazing, had amazing chemistry and connection. Then two months ago he has some personal issues which seem to then go from one disaster to the next. He is still the same person and when we are together connection is amazing, but he doesn't not deal with stress very well and whilst I've tried to be sympathic he's taken it out on me a number of times, by pushing me away. His personal issues are valid but obviously not an excuse to treat me like this. Anyway I know enough is enough and after he blocked me yesterday and I've cut contact but I can't get him out of my head. Is it just time that heals? I have got drawn back in a few times for this reason each time he pushes me away.

From experience, I imagine it's easier to move on 6 months in (although still hard) than be a mug (like I was) and drag it out for nearly 5 years.

If I could go back, I would listen to what he was saying 6 months in... blocking you is a sure sign he's telling you who he is and what he wants. X

Also, again from experience, a guy who blocks you on Christmas day I'd not worth your energy. X

Yes I agree and he has done this few times but unblocks me soon after. Which he did in middle of night (saw when woke up). I'd already blocked him, in an attempt to cut contact but I just want to forget him and it's so hard.

He's a nice guy but badly hurt by life which is what makes it hard

I find that the easiest way to move on is to look at the cold facts without emotion.
*he has ongoing personal issues which cause him to lash out
*he blocked you on Xmas day

• he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you

Then every time you find yourself feeling sad or being misty eyed over it all, remind yourself of the facts.

Change the narrative from “this man I really like doesn’t want me” to “I liked this man but I will not get a happy, healthy relationship from him so I am choosing to move on and let the feelings go”

Change the narrative, take control of your thoughts and your feelings will follow (not overnight but they absolutely will if you keep focused on the reality of the situation)

This is great thank you, I've just written it all in my journal. Thank you