Is this abuse.

[Cheekychops77]

Hi ladies. I have been out of work for a matter of weeks and had no income and I start a new job in the next week or so but my partner took it upon himself to humiliate me tonight and then told me to stop being upset after we were all having fun in front of his parents saying that I am disgusting living off him as he earns 6x more a month than me and even though I pay half the mortgage apart from this month and shopping bills, cook, clean, do all his errands amd make his lunch for work everyday he said I do nothing! To humiliate me even more he said out loud I haven't bought my mum, dad or daughter presents and im blaming him when I've said nothing of the sort yet taken days of abuse and I get money tomorrow from universal credit after 4 weeks wait so I can finally get them something and he keeps saying its his money im going to be spending because he paid the mortgage and had to buy the food for his 7 family members and my parents and daughter for Xmas day dinner this year yet hes spent over £1200 on his 3 kids who don't live with us and £1000 and his mum for xmas and said he can spend what he wants yet shouts at me because he's spending money on getting my tampons this month! I feel totally drained and sick knowing he will say nasty stuff when I buy something for them. Is he abusing me or is he right my head is a total mess x

@rocky1914

Without a shadow of a doubt, he is definitely abusive. I'd strongly advise that you start making moves to leave this relationship as this will only get worse. 4 weeks out of work and he's acting like you've been out of work for 4 years. Disgusting. LTB

Just to say, so what if you had been out of work for 4 years as opposed to 4 weeks? You have been a SAHM and Housewife for those 4 weeks, therefore, yes, he should be paying for everything until you're back in work. Absolute waste of space. LTB and fast. Sending love and best of luck, OP.

Leave. Today.

You say your paying half the mortgage is it in both your names.

I take it your not married, either way divorce lawyer and or sell the house and split.

It will never get better

Yes, it's abuse.

I hope you're not paying half the mortgage if your name is not on it, with you getting your part of the equity if your split??

@Cheekychops77

I also have no one i can talk to either im a bit scared too openly chat on the phone as he's always around

If he's earning six times more than you, how is he always around? Surely he most leave the house sometimes or you can go out to make a phone call?

I've pretty much always earnt more than my ex's. Never once have I ever mentioned it to them, belittled them about it or humiliated them in front of other people about it.

Sorry, OP, I feel a need to correct you on one thing. He didn't suddenly turn like this. The only sudden change was you bring out of work these last few weeks has suddenly brought it to light.

I had one like this too. Was hidden/not an issue when we were both working (or when he was out if work for months), but the second I wasn't bringing anything in he made it clear it's his money.

Leave. Don't even wait around til the new year. This is NOT going to get better. That less-obviously-abusive man you thought you were with is never going to come back.

@Cheekychops77

I also have no one i can talk to either im a bit scared too openly chat on the phone as he's always around

Exactly what PP said, aren't there times that he is not in the house? Or does he work from home? x

I would be getting ready to leave. He is an absolute prick, totally unsupportive and does not deserve you.