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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Christmas day apart? Are we staying in the wrong relationship because it's easier and less painful?

7 replies

useranon12 · 21/12/2021 15:47

I posted on here a while ago about me wanting to leave my 10 year relationship and father my 2 children . So it's been 4 weeks of silent treatment but being civil / sort of like friends in front kids. We went on a family Xmas day yesterday which was OK and felt like we were friends . I'm confused as to what I want I am very up and down emotionally and if I am completely honest scared of being alone 😔. I have family around me but some of them can be quite toxic and I feel I can't or shouldn't lean on them as it ends up backfiring on me . My relationship with partner can be good and when we are good I feel happy (enough) I said I wanted to break up because he wasn't pulling weight around house and can be quite rude to me. But really I think I'm questioning if I am in love with him anymore , I can't seem to answer that either way. Everyone I speak to me tells me that all long term couples go through things like this. Sorry to go back to reason I posted we had a chat and decided we will both try but it felt like he was happy either way and wasn't fussed whether we stay together or break up. We had originally planned to go meal with my side on Xmas day but when we felt out he made other plans which I agreed with. He knows he's still got an invite to spend dinner with my side now we have spoken ( its a meal out and I have paid for it) . So anyway he's decided he'd still like to spending morning with kids then go off to do his own thing meal with his family and drinks wherever his family end up going . Is that normal? I'm so confused

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 21/12/2021 16:13

Four weeks of silent treatment is four weeks of emotional abuse from him towards you. This relationship is over anyway because of the level of abuse he metes out towards you (and in turn your kids who will indeed pick up on all this). They are also receiving very mixed messages; he is being overtly nice to them whilst otherwise ignoring you as their mother. This dynamic, if you choose to remain in it, will further just mess your kids up and they could repeat similar in their own adult relationships.

What do you want to teach your children about relationships and what are they learning here?.

What is so bloody fearful about being on your own?. Feel the fear and do it anyway; it will likely be the making of you. You would not be on your own anyway because you have two children also to consider here. You're not being spoken to at all now by him; do you not feel alone within this relationship?. Feeling like you do is akin to a slow death by 1000 cuts. Better to be without this man than to be as badly accompanied as you are now.

Re your comment:-
"Everyone I speak to me tells me that all long term couples go through things like this."

No they really do not. Abusive relationships are like this, not emotionally healthy and respectful ones. No-one's seemingly ever bothered to show you what one of those is like and you still do not know (this is not it). If your friends are saying this crap to you, you need to drop them like a hot brick because they are holding you back and stopping you from reaching your full potential. They do not have your interests at all at heart here. You are absolutely entitled to a life whereby you and in turn your kids are not on the receiving end of abuse.

This man does not want change; he seems quite happy as he is because you're also doing the cooking and cleaning for him. He will be happy to continue in that vein too.

Honestly better to be apart and happier than to be together and as miserable as you are now. Do not get bogged down in your sunk costs. There are two ways to understand this process, both involving avoidance. One is an avoidance of disappointment or loss when something doesn’t work out. When a relationship doesn’t succeed, especially after a long period, especially after many shared experiences and especially after developing a hope that the relationship would be a good one, it is a loss. It is a loss of what might have been and an acknowledgement that a part of one’s life has been devoted to this endeavor.

Another angle to evaluate is that focus on “sunk cost” creates a distraction from one’s inner truth. The sentence often goes like, “I’ve already invested to much, so I can’t notice my thoughts and feelings that are telling me to end or change this relationship.”
This is a type of insidious defense against noticing yourself. You enter into a neglectful relationship with yourself which divorces you from your inner thoughts and the quiet feelings that might guide you in your life. In other words, thinking about what already has been may prevent you from deciding what you want your life to be.

After this weekend Christmas will be over; what then for you and this person?. Make the break and make 2022 a potentially far happier one. Your children will also thank you for doing that.

GregTheEgg · 21/12/2021 16:16

TBH I might take this opportunity to spend a bit of time apart - this will be the new normal if you split so you can see it as a trial run for future christmases.

It can be hard to row back from a fall out like this when family is involved, so it may that his ego is dented and he doesn’t want to be seen to be ‘giving in’.

Regardless of how it pans out long term, just try to have a nice Xmas morning with the DCs and a nice time with your respective families in the afternoon and then maybe look at where things are going with you as a couple after that. It’s a stressful enough time of year without all that.

useranon12 · 21/12/2021 16:24

Thank you that is really good advice , when I say silent treatment it's been from both ends though . I'd had enough of his treatment ( not pulling weight) and told him I didn't want to be with him so we had a row and then have started to be become civil /but doing our own thing just passing each other so its silent treatment from both sides through choice really we have both had alot of thinking to do I suppose . I have been very very emotionally crying etc but not seen much from him but then he's never really been emotional or shown his feelings ( he didn't even cry at birth our children!) I just feel ( although it was me who said it was over) that he's not assed. I thought we should give it another go and try work on issues but he's basically said he'd be easy either way whether I stay or leave, so I'm thinking do I want to be with someone who's quite OK without me and not heartbroken at thought of life without me . The Christmas thing aswell he's happy to not spend Xmas with me Hmm

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 21/12/2021 16:28

"so I'm thinking do I want to be with someone who's quite OK without me and not heartbroken at thought of life without me"

I would hope your answer to that question is no.

The two of you should not be together any longer. Its over and its over for a multitude of good reasons not least of all his not pulling his weight within the home and the silent treatment to you aka emotional abuse. Besides which, you only need to give yourself permission to leave him. No one else can do that for you.

useranon12 · 21/12/2021 16:28

Yes thank you I think I will, maybe we do need more time . His ego is probably playing a part in this as we have both been talking to our family's about our relationship problems lately so I suppose I wouldn't feel great about going to spend Xmas with his side family. What got me is he said he was going for meal and then the drinks after they will go for a piss up and he knows I'll be home by then . I'm worried the love and passion between us has gone . But I still can't know for sure so I think just time (more of it as we haven't been acting as couple fir 4 weeks ) will help.

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 21/12/2021 16:43

I have read your other threads. If this man has not pulled his weight within the home as well then I can see why the love and passion has indeed gone. You do not feel valued by him because you are really not valued.

Find a BACP registered person to work with and work with that person on your own. Do not involve family in your relationship problems; they can be both over invested and unhelpful to say the very least (as you have also likely seen).

useranon12 · 22/12/2021 21:03

I find it so so hard to find any strength or will power to make my decision stick to it and not look back. Its been a emotional rollercoaster for me these last 4 weeks and I am so so fed up ,hurt and confused. I keep realising that the relationship is not right in my head plan to stick with my gut and not change mind about leaving but then I just go back on myself and doubt everything start thinking i am in the wrong or maybe I have got a problem . I don't like many people I have around me aswell that sounds a little odd but there's no one in ky life really that i look up/trust / really enjoy being with except for kids but I'm also finding it very stressful with them too lately my daughter is 2 and as much as I love her dearly life is so very full on and I find most days very stressful. Its looking like I will leave after Xmas but I just wish I could be strong sure and feel happier about my future i just feel depressed and fed up of everything . The thought was staying in this relationship if be doesn't change or see error in his ways depresses me and the thought of going forward on my own with the kids depresses me ( sorry if tht sounds bad but I would be very lonely even if I do have my precious kids ) . Yes I am lonely now I don't know if I am holding onto some hope we will sort it out which is why I keep questioning every thing I decide but I don't think that's the right thing to do.

OP posts:
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