35 and single - words of wisdom and experience needed

[Sungoesdown]

Hi all,

As the title says - I'm 35 and (very recently) single.

I've split with my partner who was great some of the time but came with a lot of issues and a lot of baggage. I'm hoping to have children and couldn't see that happening in the relationship as things were.

I'm not ready to date just yet but will put myself back out there soon once the healing is done.

I guess I'm just worried that 'all the good ones are taken', it's too late to find someone to start a family with, and that maybe I'm just too fussy for not settling and should have just made do.

Can anyone share words of wisdom or experience of meeting their partner in mid to late 30s and having their happily ever after?

Not too late at all
I met DP when I was 37 (and a half) and we're having a baby in April. (I'll be 42)

I had a child by myself - single mother by choice via a sperm donor aged 39. Have you considered something like this if you got to a stage where you're no longer willing to keep dating? How desperate are you to have children?

Impossible to say whether you will or won't meet a suitable partner... Sadly a lot of women 'settle' in order to achieve a family, I don't believe in all of the 'when you know" stories in late 30s, it's too convenient...I'm not advocating this route but it will open up more options than if you were only looking for 'true love' 'chemistry' 'connection'.
When I did OLD I came across a lot of men who were nice and kind (most people are I've found), but for me this wasn't enough.

35 was a peak for me!
I was single attractive and confident
Met someone it was good to start then less so as time went on
I ended it when I was early 40s x have never looked back

I left my ex at 35 as it was going nowhere. I was happy to be free of him and excited that I would find someone better. Met my DP at 36 - someone who was kind and I enjoyed being with and who said he wanted a child one day.
We did some travel, partied, lockdowns, and now I just had a baby right before I turned 40.
You have plenty of time and there are good ones available- guys in a similar situation to you for example.

Sounds like you've made the right choice and saved your self alot of future hassle by deciding not to start a family with this guy who has alot of previous baggage as once you have children with him your tied together forever and have to deal with a blended family, think it's more common for females in their 30s to delay starting a family than it used to be, this is probably down to life style factors more than anything, the same goes for blokes as well who haven't started a family yet in their 30s

35 was my favourite age and I was single that year. I did have a slight nagging fear of missing my chance or whatever but I worked on myself really hard. Therapy, figured out what I wanted/needed, became a better and more helpful person. Anyway, I met him at 37 (I’m 38 now) and we’re getting married and TTC at the mo. It’s all happened very fast but feels remarkably calm and right.

It's not too late, but i would strongly recommend you do some serious research into solo motherhood and your own fertility so you can make informed choices.

Im 40, TTC with a partner i got together with 18 months ago.

Thank you, I think I will join some social clubs - I'd quite like to take dance lessons and there's a hiking group I could join too (that's if Boris doesn't put a ban on it all!)

I suppose I'm just doubting myself now too. What if I'm the problem? I look at friends, family, colleagues, and everyone else seems to have figured it out and settled down. Yet here I am, alone again. Well not entirely alone, I do have a cat. Ever the stereotype...