need to be more assertive

[passivenomore]

Anyone else hate confrontation?

I hate rows but lately I find myself less tolerant of rudeness and so on from people, especially DP.

DP can be so rude to me sometimes. If he's in a bad mood for whatever reason, I feel as though I must walk on eggshells, but I don't feel as though I have the same liberty.

When he pisses me off and I bring him up about it later, he moans that I'm lecturing and patronising him. I don't think I am, I just think that adults should be able to constructively share how they feel?

I am just fed up cos sometimes I feel that he's taking me for granted - I'm always making amends when we bicker, I'm the one looking not to piss him off. I feel resentful that I can type all this on MN but can't talk to him about this.

Sorry for rambling on

Sometimes a good old fashioned row is the best way to clear the air and get things off your chest.
My dp will not row (except when drunk then there's no stopping him ) but he's a chronic sulker.
I would rather have a scream up then forget it, whereas he will sulk for ages and then finally tell me hours later what I did to upset him, by which time I've almost forgotten and I can't be bothered to rehash it all.
Does this make any sense? I hope it does.

I hate confrontation, and yes I'm a sulker too. It's not that I can't talk, it's really hard getting the words out a,d I sit and brood on things for days, even weeks on end.

PNM try making your voice just a little bit louder, he may hear you!! As frustratitng as it is.. x x

You know, there's a book entitled 'walking on eggshells' regarding people with Borderline Personality disorder. This thread bullet points the traits.

Just a thought