does anyone else not want any sex at all?

[garlicandsapphires]

I wouldn't mind if I never have sex or have an orgasm ever again. Unfortunately I am in a relationship and TTC. I'm 38 and wonder if it could be hormonal or even perimenopausal.
It's not DP because I don't fancy anyone and he has a similarly low sex drive. I used to be quite highly sexed but looking back on this alot of it was alcohol fuelled and to please other people sadly.
I think maybe I'm not cut out for relationships? I wouldn't mind being single I don't think. But is the low sex drive something medical or hormonal? I worry it's not normal.

Good to know it’s not just me— I am now 60 and haven’t been interested for last 12 years. Main issue is having a H who is still very interested and that causes issues as I find it hard to just do it to please them and have been honest that I no longer want it. I’m ok with the ‘occasional’ hand/BJ but just not piv. Can’t explain why, it came on round about menopause time and never returned. I’m the same with kissing and general being touched/grabbed. I’ve never been a touch freely person if I’m honest though

Sounds normal time. Asexuality is a thing.
But so is depression and stress etc.

I'm 42, been single several years, I don't fancy men women or any variation there of. The thought of sex is actually quite repulsive. The fumbling and sweat and moistness and the ridiculous grunting noises.. Ew. I'd rather have a cup of tea and Garibaldi thanks.

I feel like this. Was thinking back to how I used to feel horny and sexy when I was in my 20s/early 30s, but that has all gone. I am only 44, but I just feel old. The thought of being all dolled up and flirty and mincing about just makes me cringe, as does the thought of a less attractive body (mine now and also my husband, who looks good for his age but is also past his prime).
More to the point though I just can't be bothered. I 'm one of those people who is always cold, I like being warm, and take my clothes off to dive into warm PJs - the thought of taking clothes off and getting all chilly is very unattractive. And there is always something else I would rather be doing (watching a film, reading a book etc).
I also think that because I am still occasionally breastfeeding my DC (although she is 2), I don't like the idea of yet another person touching my breasts, they get mauled enough.
All in all, I think I fancy sex about a couple of times a year, in about August when it's really hot - and when children not around (which basically doesn't happen).

After a routine marriage and 4 children sex dwindled and at 50 OH just wasn’t bothered with me, we had few common interests, kids had flown the nest, no sex for 10 yrs I got used to it and assumed my sex life was over. Fed up with no intimacy I divorced him, quite quickly I was asked for a date, after so long just holding hands started the butterflies, very quickly the desire returned, amazing what a good man can do.

Always been overrated for me. I can take it or leave it. Have left it now for last year or so. Don’t miss it in the slightest.

She told me it’s completely normal in Japanese culture for women to admit they don’t like or want sex. She has pointed out to me many times how in this culture women never admit to not wanting sex. She thinks it’s odd and unhealthy. For years I thought her perspective was odd, but lately I think she is right.

That's true but it's also much more acceptable in Japanese culture for men in these marriages to have mistresses or visit brothels.

This is shameful to admit but I haven't had sex for 11 years. I was with my ex husband for 10 of those I didn't fancybhik or anyone. I'm NOT saying this is the same for you but since I got rid of him my sex drive has come back. I just have no one to do it with lol!

Tbh I'm 37. Sex is really not on my priorities list. I. Could go without quite honestly but I can't remember a time where I have actually really enjoyed it. Sad.

I think what I have no interest in is bad, casual, banal sex!

So many men simply don't know what they are doing (going too fast, watching too much porn...) and don't make any effort to understand that seduction, foreplay and emotional connection all have a part to play.

If something is really good though it makes sense to want to do it. Completely understandable to go off sex if the above is what's on the menu.

I've always had good sexual partners, but nah, I just don't want to with anyone now.
It's a bit like making the effort to go out; fun when you do, but can't be bothered.