Hi this is more a relationship
/ health / product suggestion question.
DH has sleep disorder issues - flails about at night, always has, he usually sleeps on his back snoring loudly, I have mitigated this by investing in a good earphone headband and listening to headspace nearly all night. Sometimes I have to make him turn onto his side about 10 times a night.
I also bought a sofa bed and if he’s had one + beer he has agreed to sleep downstairs and in general he sticks to this.
However even without one beer he flails around like he’s swimming. Last night i woke up to a sharp punch between the shoulder blades, this is from him turning onto his back and elbowing me when he turned (allegedly - sometimes I do wonder). I exclaimed and shouted and he stopped snoring for about 10 mins in shock then went back to sleep while i fumed.
I’ve continually also ask him him not to keep his old heavy phone in the bed (uses it for listening to podcasts etc though I also bought him a Bluetooth headband which sits in a box), so I would also get that in the head sometimes as he moves the quilt and it goes up in the air and down again.
I’m fuming this morning and all I got was “what’s wrong with you”.
We will go days with him on the sofa (and he won’t even bother with the sofa bed will just sleep on our new sofa and ruin the shape/covers).
We have kids and no spare bedroom.
Anyway - he’ll never change I feel sorry for him in ways on the couch and complaining his back is sore but the alternative is me being injured during the night. He has some neurological problem (won’t go to a consultant of course and tbh I know they’ll just say stay off beer / coffee etc. late at night).
It’s at the point where I’ll be exhausted will go to bed early and when I hear him putting on the alarm my stomach absolutely sinks. I feel like he’s really invading my space at this stage. But at the same time k don’t want my moving room taken up by him using it as a bedroom.
Anyway I don’t think there are any bed divider products that would work - a pillow or foam won’t cut it against a man swimming in the bed. I’ve also been randomly kicked.
The bedroom isn’t big but we could fit say 2 single beds that could be pushed together sometimes (!). Im thinking more for the kids to watch tv and that sort of thing - that’s the real reason I'm reluctant to lose the double bed - the family in bed element of it when they’re sick or that. But i’m losing my marbles slightly. No he’s never remorseful apart from “sorry”. If we had a spare bedroom he’d be moving into it asap.