Is he cheating?

[PleaseDontBeTrue]

I know you don't know the answer. My spidey senses are going mad, please help me organise my thoughts and what I'm going to do.

Together 10 years, Married, 4 kids between us and 1 joint. We love each other. Normal long term relationship, sex life is up and down, we have a much longed for IVF baby who's 1 and we tried for 5 years to get him so this was a massive stressor on our sex life in my opinion. Beginning of the relationship we had lots and lots of amazing sex which has dwindled to literally just when I'm ovulating and pretty much exclusively me instigating. He never says no just to be clear, and in every other aspect of our lives we are a team and equal partners. Sex life I've just put down to having 3 teens and a baby and being in our early 40's, working and generally being knackered.

We've both been ill for the last month, all of us passing infections around so we slept separately for around 2 weeks to try and avoid the other one getting what one had so one of us could look after the baby without being ill. Friday morning he came back to our room early, around 6.30am and instigated sex. Very good, like when we were first together. Pleasantly surprising but I didn't give it more thought as I left for work at 7am. Every night since then he's instigated, sometimes twice. We've probably had more sex since Friday than we've had in the last nearly 2 years (didn't have sex at all whilst pregnant). I can't get out of my head that he's been talking to someone online whilst sleeping apart and although I genuinely don't believe he'd cheat, I'm devastated that I'm worrying he's taking out his sexual frustration for another woman on me. Is this a thing? What do I do?

I don't believe he's ever cheated, I don't believe he's had sex with anyone else nor do I really believe he actually would really. Do I just wait and see what happens? Do I ask him? I don't want to check his phone, I also don't think I'd leave him if he had been talking to someone, but I wouldn't tell him that. Literally no other changes in behaviour, not secretive with his phone, not wearing aftershave etc

What would you do?

You had great sex and he's wanting more. Nothing more to it.

He realised that he misses your previous sex life so is making an extra special effort to instigate without the awkward conversation- it's what I would do if in a similar position.

Some men have more sex with you when they're cheating but if you've not seen any suspicious behaviour from him maybe he's just trying to get close to you again

@myothercarisaskoda @bertieb7 thank you so much. I need that. I know he loves me, we have an amazing life. I just need to think less and be grateful we've got this back don't i!

I don't think it sounds like he is cheating.
I think it's very normal for marriages to go through different waves of amount of sex they are having. It depends on stress levels and work etc.
I would just enjoy it and reconnect!!

Only worry if you become suspicious of something else

@gonnabeok no other suspicious behaviour, I truly don't believe he would physically have sex with someone else but clearly I wonder if he'd talk.
@user38764345 thanks, I need to just try and remember that and not make a bid deal out of this. We're both exhausted, it's been wonderful to reconnect and I would just like to keep this connection. I love him very much and I just need to remember that

Yes 100%. You are taking the enjoyment out of it by worrying about something you don't even know is true. (We all do it!!)

Now go enjoy some Sex!! I'm currently pregnant so haven't had any in ages - looking forward to this time in the future when we can reconnect!! 😂