I've been having a tough time lately and haven't wanted to be in touch with people very much, but my dad keeps on calling me. He called me three times this afternoon and I messaged and said I was at work, then he called me again a bit later. I just don't want to talk to him at the moment.
For background: we never used to speak on the phone at all, but would sometimes email. Last year around this time I called him and said I'd really like to talk more often on the phone. He very quickly said that he didn't think that was a good idea and that it would be better to keep things as they were. Then a few months later his partner died. For two months he called me every single day for upwards of an hour. Then the frequency of calls decreased somewhat and now he calls two or three times a week. He always wants a long conversation and it's always about him and his life and his feelings and what he's been doing (including things like which forms he's had to fill in and what conversation he had with someone in the bank and so on.) He rarely asks me anything about myself, and I feel like I can't really tell him anything. He's not encouraging or supportive of me, he doesn't really know anything about my life.
I know he needs someone to support him. But right now I feel like I haven't got the energy to do that for him and I just want some space. Obviously it's a hard time for him also, coming up to the first xmas without his partner. But I just can't bring myself to answer the phone to him. What should I do? Should I just suck it up and answer the phone? Or send him a message to explain I can't talk? I feel guilty but I also just want to have some headspace to myself.