Does anyone else hate their partners ex??

[wheezie]

Am sure so many people find them so hard. i jsut find her such a parasite. she never worked since day she was pregnant, their kid is now 9. when i moved in with my partner the house was full of clothes, bags, toiletries all with labels still intact that she had bought. Apparently she rang up lot credit card debt. their divorce proceeding had jsut begun when i met him. she ended up with 65% of everything. she now has a house mortgage free, £120K in her account and still receives £500 a month. friends are like wouldnt u want as much as possible though if u had divorced. i split with my little boys father who gives me a few hundred pounds a month which basically goes on childcare, activities. i never stopped working or asked for anymore even when i was by myself with my son. My ex also puts £60 month into my sons account which i would rather. i want my partner to do this cause for his son as i know his ex is continuing to squander his money on shopping again. she took a 2 week holiday and left their son with the grandparents. half the week he is there too. the poor kid is so shy and inactive. he does no activities, watches tv and plays games all time. she apparenly never cooked a meal from scratch for him and i assume still doesnt which shows as all he wants is junk. my partner is like oh the money is for my son when he knows she spends hardly anything on him. i just get so frustrated that she seems to still have control. we have a baby of our own and i am like well now you have another child to support too. all he keeps telling me is its the law. perhaps it is but i just hate her. she is such a bitch to my partner, allows him limited access so he is now thinking of a court order. more cost to him. does anyone else have such exes present in their life? Just needed to get it off my chest.

That's a really good perspective to put on it carmenere

Oh my god, i really didnt expect to stir up so much, just wanted a rant. and i do feel a better judge than some people having just read this thread. am no means the evil stepmother far from it. i just think money would be better or some of it to his kid in an account for him for when hes older else she just spends it on a new conservatory etc.

v difficult situation Wheezie. My dh's exw wastes a hell of a lot of money and it does piss me off. I think we have every right to have an opinion on it as it is money not going into our household.

Having said that we can do feck all about it. The money should be spent on the kids but they can decide to spend it however they choose. I agree if she goes on hols she might be happier and dsc have abetter time when she comes home.

Step parenting is a thorny issue. All step mums, like me, are annoyed with exws (ones that I know in rl anyway) All mums are pissed off about step mums (again rl experience). It is difficult to not get angry when you and dh work bloody hard for a living but ex seems better off!!!

But I am glad my dh supports his children and we try to do the right thing by them, support them etc.

I've learnt over the last 3 yrs it is a no win situation and getting annoyed about something you can't influence is just added stress no one needs.

If you can just remind of that next time the exw pisses me off I'd be grateful

ahem £60 a month paid into dc's account, i dont even see that in maintenance.

what his dp and his dc with his exes are nothing to do with you.

exdps money would be an issue though,,,

The view that every penny sent in maintenence must be spent directly on the DCs annoys me (a lot of things annoy me, can you tell!!)

My XP had a crazy notion of either putting money in the bank for DD or spending the full amount directly on her every month!

But, as i am sure those of you with children of your own realise, the children have to eat, they run up electricity, you have to keep a roof over their head......all of this costs money!

in my case its not somuch the money situation but the fact that she seemingly dumps dss with whoever she can whenever she can.