I’ve had to name change for this and change a few of the details as worried the person mentioned may see it.
My sister is an alcoholic (as was my mum and her mum, all followed the same patterns). She is vindictive and manipulative when drunk and at the weekend she assaulted me and tried splitting my DH and I up. Luckily I can just about deal with it as I did the same with my mum for countless years but it’s what happened after I’m looking for advice on.
It’s transpired that she has been abusing her partner at home. My DH rang him to tell him what had happened and this is what we found out she has done to him recently:
- Come in from nights out and woken him up by screaming in his face
- Said the worst possible things to him about people who have died, how pathetic he is, etc
- Threatened to smash up all of his stuff if he leaves or tells anyone
- Threatened to hurt herself if he leaves
- Threatened to tell the police he has been hurting her if he leaves or tells anyone (and actually she has been telling her friends he’s abusive)
- Told him she has been sleeping with other people and even rang some guy up where they both laughed in her partners face at how pathetic he was
- Said she’s really depressed because of not having any money, so he helped her pay off £100s of debt only for her to laugh in his face and say she was just using him straight after
- Threatened to call up his work and parents etc and tell them lies to ruin his life
- So much more mental abuse, stealing from him, etc
She is very good at manipulating people and ruining lives because of it (she constantly does it with me, including telling my DH lies about me cheating to try and split us up).
We explained to her partner he’s in a domestic abuse situation and he needs to get out but he is SO scared. He sobbed on the phone in the car because he couldn’t talk in front of her for ages last night. He hasn’t eaten in 3 days and she just continues to push and push him. I’m so worried for him.
What do we do? How can we support him when he’s so scared to even tell anyone or leave in case she breaks everything he owns or worse? I’ve always hated my sisters behaviour towards me but this is absolutely another level.
Please help us!