Integrating partner with kids

[OneForTh]

I've been with my partner for two years, we live apart as both have kids and FT jobs, live about 40 mins from each other.

He's seen my two primary age dds about once a month for the past 6 months, just for pizza or an afternoon in the park together.

Although we don't plan to live together (kids ages and genders don't fit well) we're planning for him to spend more time at mine (3 nights a week) and less time for me at his. He wfh whereas I work in retail, so best fit.

The plan is for him to spend a night at Xmas at mine and then build to once a week after that. Anyone have experience of this, the pitfalls, how to make it work for kids etc? Obviously if they struggle with him being around more I'll reduce it again, their welfare matters most. I'd like my kids to feel happy and comfortable with him being there, whilst also giving a happy adult relationship half of the week for me and him.

FYI two of the three nights a week he will be staying my kids will be at their dad's house.

I think if you go slowly it will be okay but I wouldn’t start around Christmas- it’s a big and often emotionally charged time for dc so I’d wait until the new year.

Everything sounds sensible but do not start on christmas. Wait an extra couple of weeks.

If he’s only going to be there one night a week then it’s not a big deal really

I'd try to cram a night in before Christmas to see how it goes. Maybe a mid week school night so they are already in a routine and it's less of a big deal.