Grandparents views

[crispsandnuts]

I'm sure this will be more popular after Christmas. However, my elderly parents are generally kind and thoughtful and I'm lucky to have them in my life still. However....they tend to drop into conversation about my DC being spoilt, they tend to compare what they/I had as children and obviously its so very different to this generation.
They've also lost touch on how to relate to them (pre teens) as they're not the cute little children who loved to cuddle them and fuss over them.

I guess this is normal as DC get older but I'm struggling with the difference in views/age. Any good tips on how to bite your tongue for the whole of Christmas? or is alcohol the answer? Then I feel guilty for feeling like this as they are elderly etc..

Smile and say times have changed and we are doing things differently. Would your kids be up for something like a board game or charades which is more structured?

Its hard to grin and bear it. But yes, Ill encourage games like that. It all feels like forced fun, ah the joys of Christmas..

No advice but I have the same. Dm wants them to cuddle up in the sofa and watch a film, they want to disappear into their rooms and chat to friends online. I've repeatedly made suggestions of things to engage them but she ignores me

A less structured activity would be having a jigsaw table that people can drop in and out of (if you have room).

It's a bugger, isn't it!

We live abroad so only see GPs twice a year at best, & Christmas is always a bit fraught - the dc do actual Xmas with their dad then join me & DPs for a few days. Disappearing to their rooms to chat to mates online is always a bone of contention.

Our saving grace is Mah Jong, oddly enough. My late dgm was fanatical about it, taught it to her dc (my mother & various aunts) & dgc (me & cousins) & it's still a bit of a family 'thing'.

I've passed the tradition on to my own dc, as has my cousin, & if we manage a good family tournament my mother is happy! Dc are well up for this & enjoy it.

I'd recommend one good evening with a multi generational game like Monopoly. Make it clear to dc that this isn't negotiable, it's an expectation that they participate with enthusiasm & good grace. For one bloody evening.

In my experience that's quite enough gp/dgc intensive interaction & the older adults are quite relieved to have the teens take themselves off.

Although my dad is currently thrilled at the thought of taking ds to the village local for his first pint. Ds is rather looking forward to this too.

12-16 is the worst bit. After that, they get lots better at being civilised & sociable..m