My husband and I met 11 years ago and it was a whirlwind romance. I met him as a single parent, one child is autistic. When we met I felt like my world was complete. We fell pregnant really fast and have the most beautiful daughter.
Over the years we have had many ups and downs but we have both tried to persevere. However he started working away which strained us all. Our relationship changed bit by bit.....communication breakdowns, arguing, jealousy etc.... After the first 18 months I asked for him to leave the job....
My daughter one day ate home last year found sex tablets. An amazon parcel was next to the bin with an empty box of the packaging inside. With his name on.....why would he need that? We have never had a problem.
He started to become jealous of my phone, what i was doing on social media, what time would i be home etc....
Which I have found stressful and even came to a point where I would dread going home at the weekends.
He started to accuse me of cheating over the years and recently although I work and sort the house and kids. He said he had a spy app on my phone, became emotionally and verbally abusive, and began gaslighting. I fell into depression, at times had suicidal thoughts, even apologised in the past to appease him.
My daughter idolises him and became very dependant on him arriving at the weekends. Like santa claus always spoiling her although i would be disciplinarian. Gradually I could see she would be playing us off eachother...as kids do!
Anyway fast forward to now, we had a row because he accused me of being a cheat. We had a massive bust up and he has taken my daughter. He has ghosted me communications wise and I know she is at school.
The first few days I felt really dreadful, as we were happy when we were happy. One of those couples people aspire to, that perfect happy looking family. Now I feel relieved, does it sound bad? I feel relieved from not having that buzz in my ear all the time. That feeling of isolation, anxiety to get home fast, the stress of worrying if I pass a stare in public, being accused. The feeling of paranoia using my phone.....
I do miss my daughter and am going down professional channels. I think that she is being used to hurt me. However, instead of fighting.... I have decided to find myself again and if he wants to take on the role I've had, which is hard. Perhaps he should? Then he would realise I had no time to cheat?