Jealous of my sister and her boyfriend

[TTlover]

Hi all.

I think I just need a space to spill my feelings and see what responses I get.

I have been in a relationship for 8 years now. We’ve had our ups and downs. Tonight my sister who is 24 visited with her new boyfriend (she has never had a boyfriend before). He is a soldier and is very chivalrous with her (flowers, thoughtful dates, old school respect). You can see from the way they look at eachother that they’re madly in love.

I am soooo happy for my sister. But I can’t help but feel jealous?

They were talking tonight about how she met his family and friends and they went out to places and had a great time. I sadly don’t have that with my boyfriends family, and we don’t have many friends as a couple either.

It’s just really made me question myself and my relationship. I don’t know why - as I haven’t been unhappy. It’s just this event has made me sit back and reflect.

Is this normal? Any advice? Thank you in advance.

They are still in the honeymoon stage.

Long term relationships are different to the first flush of new love and we’re not all lucky in our in laws.

What does this make you think of your own relationship and partner? Is something lacking apart from external things like inlaws and friends?

Does your bf make you feel loved and appreciated?

Well if you need to look at your relationship do it

They're all shiny and new and you're comparing them with you're worn in and comfy relationship. It's not a like for like.

New relationship...honeymoon period. This is the stage when people are all over each other, and tend to overlook the faults. It is infatuation and all that biochemical attraction going on. It is not the same as the long term relationship you have. The honeymoon period has long gone and you are missing the excitement of the early stage. It is normal to crave that, especially once the daily routine kicks in. If you want that back, have some date nights, take a break together etc. Hopefully your sister will have a lovely relationship but it is far too early to call it now. Feel glad for her, and use this event to identify what is missing in your own relationship.

I think if it made you think, it's worth taking some time to reflect on it

Is it that you used to have that with your DP but don't now, or that you've never had it?

I notice that whenever I’m jealous of someone else’s relationship when I already have a partner it’s because something is missing in my relationship.