What to do for the best..... Long post...
Both my sister and brother rarely contact me other than birthdays etc or some other family reason.
Over the years I have always been the one to travel to see them for any occasion, although in fairness they have always catered including Christmas day on many occasions.
My daughter (now 19),did say how hurt she felt that no one came to us especially for her birthday.. Again we travelled to them to celebrate as a family.
We all have children but mine is the youngest at 19.
My niece had a baby earlier this year and once again I was the person who arranged after lockdown to all meet up and celebrate the occasions we had missed.
Obviously last Christmas we did not meet up and it was a real chill out time, my daughter and I had Christmas day with her dad who was on his own (we get on OK).
We didn't buy family presents and it was nice to enjoy Christmas without the stress of buying presents and travelling 4 hrs on Christmas day (there and back).
My niece contacted me yesterday to ask if myself and my daughter would like to come to theirs for Boxing day for food and to exchange presents. My sister had been in contact with my brother and he and his family are going. I had exchanged messages with my niece last week because it was her birthday and I had sent flowers.
I was fully intending to buy presents for the little one but having had god knows how many years buying presents for 8 family members (4 in each family plus my sils mum who comes for a little while on Christmas day) I just don't feel I want to do it anymore. The financial pressure is too much given that I feel that I have to buy reciprocal priced presents yet there are only two of us.
It is a nice experience opening presents together and it is one of the only times of the year we now do get together but it was the Christmas Day experience.
I know my niece would want to make it special for her little girl, first Christmas.
So, I'm not sure what to do. I had tentatively looked at myself and my daughter going away for a few days from boxing day (covid permitted). I was going to pop a box of presents for the little one to my niece when I was working nr her next week.
I feel mean if I don't go but also I have to address the fact that I'm not going to do presents for everyone and need to let them know.