Online Dating

[ecoactive1]

Probably the wrong time of year to consider using dating sites/apps but what are the good ones currently? Have used Match.com in the past but found it shite and don't feel it makes any difference whether you pay or not.

I would ultimately like a long term committed relationship but only if i met the right person.

Tbh I don’t think paying makes a difference as I think most men are on all of them

I just deleted Tinder so I'd be keen to find out if there are any I'm missing!

On MN people often recommend Bumble (no personal experience).
Tbh any online dating is 'a bit shit' in terms of having to trail through disappointing dates for a wihle unless you are among the lucky few - but many find luck eventually.

I met my now H on POF. Was on Match too .

@CatAndHisKit

On MN people often recommend Bumble (no personal experience). Tbh any online dating is 'a bit shit' in terms of having to trail through disappointing dates for a wihle unless you are among the lucky few - but many find luck eventually.

Where is the evidence that most find luck? Dating apps have literally been designed to keep us swiping ad infinitum, keeping us hooked on the idea of hitting a high when we get a match (look up Nancy Jo Sales and Shank Silver who investigate this topic quite in depth) with the illusion of choice embedded in their algorithms.

Most relationships didn't and do not start out with 'matches', look around you, your family and friends/colleagues, I'd be more inclined to say they'd met through school/college/university/work...

I think nowadays a large proportion meet old. It seems to be the norm for 20 somethings too. Whereas before you were a bit sad to be old and had to hide it!

I suppose it can work if you don't expect to find your life partner and treat it like meeting someone new who you may or not click with.

I don't think any online dating platform works if your actively looking for a relationship. By that i mean thinking the person your talking to is going to be your partner without meeting them. Have had that happen on Tinder and POF where the guy said he loved me and wanted to marry after never meeting. Not normal behaviour at all. I told them you can't love someone you have never met and that love takes time to develop. Didn't go down too well lol.

Tinder, Hinge and Bumble are all OK and lots of guys are on them all. Personally I found Bumble guys to be the most flakey, but that may just be me. It takes a thick skin and patience (and humour) but there are good ones on there. Also nutcases but try and weed them out early on!

@KintsugiForever At least you don't get messaged by people your not interested with the matching type ones.