Health anxiety with suicidal ex

[PoppetOHF]

Just wondering whether anyone on here suffers with health anxiety and did you struggle becoming a single parent. Bit of a background our relationship was quite toxic with domestic abuse too. We have been split up a year although he still tries to win me back. His mental health has took a huge dip recently and im scared if I don't get back with him he will do something to himself. And the thought of being my childrens only parent terrifies me. Im constantly worried I have cancer etc and the thought of me dying or being seriously ill and him not being there just hurts so much. Any advice appreciated please xxx

Don't get back with him. It will ruin your child's life.

Not sure if helpful, but my ex did proceed to overdose and actually its been beneficial to dc, much more settled and confident and being a single parent is fine, dc behaviour improved and we are a happy little unit. Maybe seek help for your health anxiety, I do have a will and provisions for dc set out but I don't dwell on it

Many people worry about the threat of someone hurting themselves if they don’t do what that person wants, it’s very hard to be in that situation.

However if someone is in that position (rather than using it as emotional blackmail) then you couldn’t necessarily stop them anyway. Tricky as I hear what you’re saying about the kids but it’s not safe to have him back due to DV.

If you look around your support network, friends or family, hopefully thee are people there who would step up if you were poorly, and you probably won’t be, as you said that’s the anxiety bothering you.

Crosspost @Kangaruby and sorry for what your family must have gone through

Thanks ChoccyJules but things are more settled, telling dc was difficult but really not the nightmare you would imagine

He's still emotionally blackmailing you.

He needs professional help if he's suicidal, not someone he's previously abused.

It's attention seeking.

Seek help from Women's Aid.

If he's threatening suicide, keep any texts and call the police.

He's your ex and a fully grown adult, it's up to him to look after himself, not you.

My ExH also killed himself when my DC were little. There are times it has been tough but not as tough as when he was alive and I felt I was constantly on edge wandering what he would do next. My DC do get upset occasionally but it's more about the idea of him than actually him if that makes sense.

My exH loved our DC but he would have been useless if he had been their only parent. He had too much other stuff going on including mental health difficulties and alcohol dependency to ever be able to put them first.

You cannot go back to an abusive relationship. You and your DC matter and your health and well-being is important!