Zero sex drive

[Checkedshirt]

Hi All,

Bit of an awkward one, but this is anonymous, so here goes.

I am 37 and have zero sex drive. Nothing. My partner is very supportive, but I know it's horrible for them. I was sexually assaulted whilst on a beach several years ago (before I met my partner), but I don't think it's come from that. Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you overcome it? I'm terrified of losing my partner (I love them to bits, and am in love with them), but also terrified of going to therapy.

I makes us both really sad. We were quite sexually active when we first met, but over the past couple of years I have just become void of any desire.

Thank you.

How's your energy generally @Checkedshirt ?
Do you exercise?

Energy pretty good, and yeah I run three times a week so fit and healthy otherwise.

If you’re terrified of therapy to help you have sex, then perhaps you are also in some way terrified of sex. Worth making the effort to go, I’d think.

Can you put into words why you're terrified of therapy?

There could be many reasons why your sex drive has tanked, from hormonal changes to psychological changes to, well, having simply gone off your partner. If you're unhappy with your level of sex drive it would be worth exploring the first two before making any decisions about your relationship.

How do you feel emotionally about pleasuring your partner in non-PIV ways? If it repulses you then it may not be a hormonal reason.