Introducing kids to new partner

[lori0310]

I was a single mother of 2 kids, spilt with their father 9 years ago, last year I meet someone, we have officially been dating just over 6 months, a lot has happened in these months, I have found out he's been sharing a bed with his ex wife, apparently they was fully clothed
and not actually having sex, but he's also been away for 3 days with her and his best mate too, where he shared a room with his best mate. since all of this has come to light I have met his kids and his best mate, they all know we are in a relationship, I'm now not doubting his honestly where the ex is concerned. My kids know about him but haven't met him. He wants to spend xmas with us but I have this doubt in the back of my mind about introducing him to my kids cause of everything that has gone on before. Am I right to doubt even though Ive meet both his kids, these aren't little kids that can be manipulated they are 16+

You’ve only been together 6mo - I’d wait a bit. At least with any sort of big movements like merging households.
As to him ‘sharing the bed’ - was that one occurrence? What actually happened - a trip planned long ago? Why are he and his ex travelling together? How long has he been divorced?
And how old are your kids

Xmas itself - I do think is a family day and he doesn’t quite qualify yet. But I’d probably consider him coming over at some point before or after - say for lunch/dinner. Short introductions are best to start with anyway.
Your kids know he exists anyway. If you broke up - they’d know as well.
So I don’t think there is harm in gradual introductions.

Do your kids really want to spend their Christmas Day feeling awkward around some random man? I doubt it.

Regardless of that, if he’s making you feel this way just a few months in, there’s not much hope is there? Sharing a bed with his ex, going on holiday together. Fine if they have that kind of relationship, but he’s unlikely to knock it on the head because you don’t like it when he clearly thinks it’s fine. I’m sure you can do better than this man.

Get him to spend Christmas with his ex.
I don't think him coming to yours for the first time is great on Christmas day.

A day out, doing something would be far more relaxed, I think.

Not actually sure why you're still with him, never mind introducing him to your kids, doesn't sound like a keeper

Make 2021 the year you leave this ime slime ball behind...
Fully clothed my eye.

Wait at least 2 to 3 years, or until the youngest is 18, whichever comes first.

‘Fully clothed’ 😄
All sounds a bit of a joke, best not to inflict him on your kids, why not just date him if you’re into lies and drama? Kids and sex life entirely separate.