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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Just finished with my boyfriend of 2 years. Feeling sad

6 replies

Joy69 · 20/11/2021 18:46

So after a lot of deep thinking Ive finally put my big girls pants on & finished with my boyfriend. Feeling sad because he is such a nice guy, but never stood up for what he wanted & preferred to moan about it. We've had issues with ex wife & forever changing days that he has the kids ( I posted about this last year & should have taken mumsnet advice) I have recently been told that I need an operation & have been in considerable pain for 7 months. It has stopped me from being active as before. He has commented that he has become depressed since we haven't been doing our usual activities. I did reply that's why he needs hobbies & to connect with friends; He can't rely on me to entertain him. I suppose Ive just realised that he wanted me as an emotional prop & now that Ive run out of steam physically & mentally it's gone tits up.
I know it's the right thing to have done, but feel so sad that potentially we could have had such an amazing relationship if he'd have had more backbone. There are other things that were problematic, but the post will be too long Hmm

OP posts:
Dillydollydingdong · 20/11/2021 18:51

You know you've done the right thing. So don't worry about it. Well done. It'll take you a little while to recover so be a big brave soldier.

BrilliantBetty · 20/11/2021 18:54

It does seem like it is for the best.
He would be very unlikely to change.

Hope you start feeling better with regards to your health. And hope you have some friends there for you IRL.

HunkyPunk · 20/11/2021 18:55

Sorry you're going through a rough time op. It's a pity he couldnt have been more supportive of you. Havent really got any words of wisdom, but Flowers

Crumblinginside · 20/11/2021 18:58

This is a sad situation but you know yourself
The agony would be prolonged. Don't be tempted to go back. Flowers

Free6874368 · 20/11/2021 22:10

I am sorry your going through this, you have obviously gone with your gut instinct which I believe is rarely wrong Flowers

Joy69 · 20/11/2021 22:53

Thankyou for all your replies. Free6874368 I think my gut has been screaming at me for a few months now, but you ignore it hoping things will improve. He has phoned tonight to see if we can still be friends, which is fine & to say it is his fault for not standing up for himself. As I've said he's not a bad person, just let's people walk all over him to the detriment of the ones that he cares about. I feel better at finally finishing the relationship, it was making me unhappy.
Going to focus on myself now ( if the teenagers will let me Grin)

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