I'm new here and need some advice and a hand hold please.
DS is a gorgeous bright little boy primary school age but his dad is just not interested. He would rather be with his friends, He will spend 90% of his free time with his friends (I'm talking out twice a week minimum during the week and both weekend days from about 11am -10pm) and maybe 10% of it with DS but the TV/phone staring will always be involved when he is here.
He doesnt take him on days out, for walks, to do any sports or activitys (DS loves sports and is in a few clubs), even simple stuff at home like cooking or games. I have yelled, begged, pleaded, cried ect ect and nothing changes.
His answer is he works full time and I work part time and he pays slightly more towards the bills and needs a break. I work 33 hours a week so am barely part time and do all the school runs, driving to and from activitys, homework help, housework (I dont do anything for him like washing or cooking but I have to clean the house so my DS doesnt live in a dirty house and has clean plates ect)
We live basically separately but under one roof and are no longer intimate in anyway as I cant like or respect someone who puts his lifestyle before his child. I have asked him to leave and he wont, I am trying to sort everything so me and DS can leave but obviously this takes time ect as we need somewhere to go and I dont want to loose the house which is in joint names.
My question is how do I stay sane and support my DS in the meantime? Its horrible to see my DS come constantly second and see his dad just go off all weekend and not care. DS does love him but hes so used to his father not being around he never asks where he is or where hes going.
His family have tried to talk to him about it but he doesnt care what they think and his friends are all wasters. Think 40 year olds with no decent careers, live in a shit tip and are drunk by 11am types.
DS was planned and much wanted and his father wasn't always like this. He had a lovely set of friends but he dumped them all when they started getting married and having familys.
Sorry for the essay, just need some support getting through.