Anyone else surrounded by a male household who find emotional stuff difficult?

[BellaBooHoo]

I've got two teenage ds and DH, all of whom have a tendency to be emotionally distant or uncomfortable with emotional stuff. I'm pretty emotional and sensitive, though make sure I don't 'gush' with it, but often end up sad when I feel I have no one close who really gets me or gives me spontaneous affection. I have to always instigate it! The only 'I love you's' come from me (and occasionally DH); the only spontaneous hugs come from me (and occasionally DH).

I realise teenage boys are often uncomfortable with hugs and open signs of affection, and I carry on giving my affection regardless. DH isn't the best example for them I often have to prompt him for hugs and 'I love you's. I feel sad inside that I rarely receive unprompted affection from anyone but accept that this might be it for the rest of my life.

Does anyone have the same with their family? Or reassure me that things might change?

Sorry you feel like this.

I'm afraid I'd be surprised if things did change, as your sons are clearly taking a lead from their father. But I'd persist with asking for hugs and so on anyway.

I think you should persist, as your sons need to see that it's OK to show their emotions.

By the way, I don't think this is necessarily a male / female thing. Amongst my immediate family and closest friends, in most cases it's the DH who is the most emotionally open.

Yep. I’m a single mum of teenage boys. Cuddles are like gold dust round here. All I can suggest is getting a big fat Tom kitten. They are super soft and affectionate!

Why is your Dh like this?
What do they say when you talk about it?

My Dh is very loving and we talk about emotions, so therefore teenage ds's do too.

Yea I have 2 DS who went through this. Eldest is now 19 and does hug me again. Youngest won't hug at all.

it's not cool to hug your mum in your teens 😀

Two teenage DSs here, very emotionally intelligent DH, always hugged as a family and said I love you etc. However, both DSs don't hug a lot these days (18 and 15). Older one does a good line in 'leaning' which is not quite a hug, but some contact at least . Younger one virtually recoils when he smells a hug . That is, apart from one time recently when he was upset about something and wanted to hug me for ages.
So, it's still in there, but the no hug years are all part of us letting them go, it's normal (if a little sad sometimes! Also, we now have a dog and he's a hugger for sure)