I have been in a relationship with dp for 7 years. We have two children together 3 and 5. Since our first child was born I suffered with horrible pnd and found out he contacted an escort website to arrange a meet up and although said he didnt contsct anyone did order chlamydia pills (which I found out a couple of years later).
Ever since I have lived in a state of him overstepping boundaries that I have set out (dating sites, only fans, porn addiction, sending explicit photos) and he has always gaslit or made me feel bad so I've forgiven him mostly to try and do what's best for the kids.
Obviously our sex life is shot and we do it once a week maybe and if we dont hes either in a massive huff or I'm paranoid that hes cheating on me. I also do 99% of childcare/housework and he spends a lot of time on his playstation or asleep (you know the type) Obviously I've had no confidence and financially breaking up has not been an option as we live paycheck to paycheck. I feel numb at this point and just rock bottom confidence.
Today I found out hed signed up for admire me and subscribed to somebody we know mutually (which is a boundary that I have set clearly that I have an issue with) I've been ready to split up for ages but I don5 know how to go about it. He wouldn't be able to move anywhere else and I know hed make my life miserable until I gave in. Does anyone have any advice?