Stag do

[Daisy195]

DP has been invited to his friends stag do in February. It’s 3 nights in Cornwall. We have 2 young children and we aren’t exactly rolling in money. We live in Manchester so we are a long way away from Cornwall. Since having both DC, we have never been on holiday as a family as money has been tight and whenever I suggest saving up to go somewhere, even if it’s just somewhere in the UK, he always brings up our money situation and says we can’t afford to yet. And to top it off it’s DS’s birthday on the day he’s meant to go. His friend has said he needs definite numbers by tonight. Would I be out of order to have a talk with him later about it, or should I just suck it up?

I think a lot of people (men in particular) need to learn the expression ‘I can’t afford it’ — he can’t afford it OP, tell him if he stops gambling immediately and commits to a small family holiday next year then that’s the minimum, otherwise he can’t go— it’s family money, not his to just decide his priorities,

That money that he's pissing up the wall gambling could easily pay for a lovely little caravan holiday within a few months!
The cheek of him.

@Daisy195

He also spends a lot of money gambling. At least £30-£40 every week. If not more. Then when he wins he gambles it in order to win more. The other day for example he won £40, gambled it all, then ended up with nothing

This is one of those threads where the op posts about one issue, when in fsct there is at least one other giant issue that then gets introduced in the middle of the thread.

Can't afford a modest family holiday, but gambling regularly.

Honestly, with men like this, you'd probably be better off a single Mum.

If you knew before you had kids with him, no offence but .....

I would immediately separate your money and all family money, including his contributions from him so that he cannot get his hands on any of it. I am sure his "savings plan" will be to gamble everything you have.

Gambling?? When you can't afford to do anything as a family?
Has he ever won and used the money to pay for anything for the family?
I'm betting that's a big fat no.
LTB

Don't stay with a gambler who would rather waste even more family money on a stag do than a family holiday and on his son's birthday to boot.