Am I reading too much into this?

[RepelloMuggletum]

So DH went out tonight for drinks after work, he met an old work mate while there, they sometimes went cycling together in the past (dh, friend and friends OH). His friends OH wasn't there, but when dh got in (quite tipsy) he was rambling on about them and how we should all meet up etc (i haven't met either of them). I noticed that he was messaging her on whatsapp, 'I love "friend", I've missed him, and you x'
He's mentioned her a few times over the years but nothing that would make me think that anything was going on. I'm just thinking why would he be messaging his friends OH, and adding Xs. Unless messaging family he never does.

We've been together 13 years with 2 DC, maybe it was the drink and I'm over reacting, I haven't asked him about it, he's totally KO'd.

I don't think this alone is necessarily anything to worry about as he obviously hasn't been in touch with this girl to have said he missed her too. His main focus seemed to have been her partner and he would unlikely message her while around you if he was hiding anything. If he was tipsy that could explain the kiss as more friendly under the influence.

Thanks for replying frazzled, it's just a bit out of character i guess, maybe I need to give my head a wobble! Most likely over friendliness due to drinking as you said. Anyhow I'm currently on the sofa, his snoring has given me the rage even more than the bloody message.

Agree with @Frazzledmummy123
It doesn't sound alarming. Sounds like he's added on the "and you x" as an after thought, a tipsy after thought. They're never our finest moments.
Seems like he's more invested in the friendship with her OH. Who knows why he was messaging her and not him, could you ask him?

He probably doesn't have the OH s number if they've not seen each other in years. She probably gave him her number tonight so that's the one he used but agree it sounds like message intended for OH and X is just nostalgia and alcohol xx

So old work mate was out, his female partner wasn't out but your DH was prompted to send her an emotional message about how much he loves and misses her partner who he's just seen and sneaks in a cutesy 'and you x' to her. No, it doesn't sound good to me.

If there was anything worrying there - he’d not be texting in front of you, and wouldn’t be suggesting you all meet up. He’d be keeping you away from her.
And - he’d have been continuing cycling with them. Just to keep seeing her, and keep a connection going.

Drunk people get over friendly and over emotional. Adding to that the year+ of social isolation - and seeing old friends after what seems to have been a traumatic period. And boom.
We have a ‘miss you’ and an ‘X’….

Why are you so on guard? Is there a reason you are doubting him?

He had his back to me in bed, and as I was sat up I glanced over at him messaging. That's how I saw it. Ok, I know I was wrong to do this but....I took his phone while he was sleeping, he sent that message at 7pm, I don't think he would had been drunk that early, and he would have been with his friend then too, so I'm a bit more suspicious now. He came in at 10.30pm.
There are no other messages previously, and she messaged back, changing subject to cycling and no Xs. Hes waffled on and asked if his mate had got home.

He stopped cycling due to my working hours, I dont have any reason to not trust him, I'm probably projecting somewhat, but the other night I dreamt he cheated on me! So confused!

I don't think there's anything going on. The woman's obviously not having any of it. She's changed the subject and not responded with x.

I'd say that message was deliberately constructed that way to fish for reciprocal interest.

He's overstepped the line here.

She shut the message down. I don't think there is anything to worry about.

It’s odd. The fact he was out with the friend but then messaged the friends wife? Saying he missed them both. And at 7, I doubt he’d of been off his head?
Only thing I can think is he was so pleased to see his friend, got caught up in the reminiscing and perhaps they were chatting about partners and he randomly decided to message her. It’s a bit weird. But we’re the 3 of them all close, so equally good friends with him and her?
Her reply shut it down. When was her reply? Still when out with friend?
Potentially it’s a bit odd, but perhaps does depend what the friendship dynamic was like before.
I think don’t jump to conclusions, but I’d keep an eye out if he starts talking about her, meeting up with them both without you. If he includes you next time it’s likely innocent and was caught up in the catching up with old friends moment.