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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Did you ex pop up again out of the blue? Don’t know what to make of this

11 replies

Lampppe · 28/10/2021 05:02

Around 5 months ago I felt I had to end a relationship that was going nowhere. In short, we’d been together almost a year and he made zero effort to weave me into his life or weave into mine, properly. We were practically living together at the end but it would literally be dinner, bed, repeat. He had little interest in getting to know my parents, or me knowing his, as an example of many things! Anyway, it got more and more tense and eventually I said enough, this wasn’t fair, I didn’t want a teenage relationship etc. He didn’t resist. Seemed relieved in fact, though was tearful. I suggested we could try and talk things through and he was silent. So I left. Heard absolutely nothing since.

I was devastated that it was over. I had two months of darkness. I’d really thought he was the right one for me and loved him very much, which he knew.

Last night he text ‘hey how are you?’ I’m not with anyone new, though I am dating. Has anyone else had this? I feel really shaken by it.

OP posts:
ThirdElephant · 28/10/2021 05:08

Just block him. Lots of people get in touch with exes- it's natural to be curious about how someone who you used to be so close to is getting on. However, you're under no obligation to satisfy that curiosity, and given that it's shaken you so much, I suggest blocking and deleting.

Tlollj · 28/10/2021 05:11

He wants a leg over. Just ignore him.

altforvarmt · 28/10/2021 05:13

Block him. He wasn't 'the one' and he doesn't deserve your headspace.

Alonelonelylonersbadidea · 28/10/2021 05:58

Block block block, for your own mental health!

updownroundandround · 28/10/2021 06:47

He's testing the waters for a repeat.

The repeat would be a carbon copy of your earlier 'relationship' i.e on his terms only.

Best reply is one I read earlier today from another poster....

''You're 5 months too late''

Munchkinpumpkin · 28/10/2021 20:21

He wants sex and will disappear after, be warned

LetHimHaveIt · 28/10/2021 20:25

I thought by 'out of the blue' you were talking about an ex from at least five years ago.

He's chancing his arm. Don't be daft.

Pinkbonbon · 28/10/2021 20:27

Just looking for either an ego boost or to hoover you up for a repeat of the same old crap. Delete and block.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 28/10/2021 21:18

Ah, another version of the 'Hey stranger' text.

Always ignore!

Wiredforsound · 28/10/2021 21:33

He’s after a shag. You finished for a very good reason. Don’t lose sight of that.

samesign · 28/10/2021 21:44

Why does he care how you are months later, it didn't work out. He's either remembering you with rose tinted glasses or wants a shag, I would ignore or you risk going though the same break up all over again.

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