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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Decided to separate but now what?

2 replies

LucyLovesCheese · 24/10/2021 17:14

This really!, finally after literally years of indecision (me), probably fear of the unknown and me believing promises that where never going to be kept, myself and my H have agreed to separate.
We agreed he would look for somewhere else as we have children who will be with me and currently rent with a joint tenancy . We decided we would tell the children when he found something suitable.
All seemingly going to be amicable.
Except he has made no practical movement to find somewhere.
What do I do? I can’t face living together like this forever.
I found a smaller house that would suit me and the children but as we have a council tenancy I would need him to come off the current tenancy for me to take the new one and if he has nowhere to live he won’t do it.
Moneys tight so it will be tricky but he is dismissing any possibility’s.
Any ideas on how to move forwards from this?

OP posts:
SweetBabyCheeses99 · 24/10/2021 17:59

Maybe speak to the council housing department? It’s super hard to get a council house so I don’t know if it’s a good idea for you both to relinquish this voluntarily and go into the private sector?

I’m sure you’re not the first couple to be in this situation so perhaps there’s a way Roy d this without him holding you hostage.

LucyLovesCheese · 24/10/2021 18:11

Sorry I didn’t make it very clear, I’m hoping to swap council homes not relinquish mine and taking the other house in my sole name- I will need him to agree to this tho.
My stbx is very good at agreeing to things but not following through - ongoing issue through the marriage so I need to figure how to move this forward as I’m pretty sure he doesn’t mind living together as we are!

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